I have been with my boyfriend for 5 years now and I really like this other guy I met at work.. I feel so different towards this guy than I do my boyfriend.. I think about him all the time.. even when I'm with my boyfriend. I love my boyfriend with all my heart but this guy makes me feel that way towards him to. When I'm with this guy I have butterflies in my stomach all the time.. Im scared to lose my boyfriend but I feel like I could run away with this guy.. I don't want to hurt my boyfriend and I don't want him to be alone.. I don't know what to do please help in anyway you can...

Sometimes the grass isn't always greener on the other side. We can't tell you which decision to make, but just remember there are consequences to your actions. This new guy could be a real jerk and you might throw away 5 years for a quick fling.

My advice, talk to your boyfriend about the underlying issues on why your not happy. Every relationship hits a rut, most can be worked out but some are better left alone and break up

Yeah, sometimes the grass isn't always greener on the other side because they've weeds too.

You love your boyfriend but since this new guy came along and sparked your interest your ready to leave him. This isn't love.

So right now instead of prolonging hurting your boyfriend do the womanly thing and leave. There is no nice way to break up with him because if he's doing right and love you, believe me he's going be crush. Don't waste no more of his time.

Also, don't be surprise if don't work out because in life we have choices and those choices lead to decisions and we have to deal with the decisions we make and live with them.

If you ask me getting involved with someone you work with isn't a good one but it's your life. And how can you leave someone of 5 years for someone you knew how long?

Think wisely and go give your boyfriend the bad sad news.

Sounds like your getting tired of the relationship maybe you and your man should try to spice things up a bit. Be spontaneious. Apparentley there's something lacking in your relationship and you need to address the issue.

I really cannot say I'd agree with telling your boyfriend about this. Nor do I think this is the indication of some serious hidden problem within your relationship.

I think it's a crush and adding the fact you've spent 5 years with the same guy your wondering if things would be better elsewhere. I was in a long term relationship and the same thing happened to me. I thought of this one girl everyday for a month and she seemed more perfect than my current g/f of 5 years. After the month ran it's course I could have caredless about her and was glad I was with my g/f.

I think this happens a lot, it could become a problem or it could fizzle out into nothing like mine did. I sure am glad I didn't tell my g/f all ofthis at thetimecause I would have thrown away something great over nothing. Ultimately, we are not together anymore so I wonder if I actually should have... nah:)

You will meet many people you are attracted to, that's so human. What you do about it is what's important.

I suggest you stay within the bounds of good behavior, and be a loyal partner, as intense feelings, like lust, can fade as quick as they came.

Wow, this is what my ex girlfriend did to me.. Don't let it drag on if you seriously think you will end up leaving you boyfriend for this guy - you will crush him (not that he isn't going to crushed anyway)

Similar situation ish, my ex told me that she thinks she is in love with this other guy after a year of relationship and 5 years of friendship - she knew the guy for a couple of months. I asked her to make a choice and she couldn't just throw him away so I got up and left her - respect yourself before anyone else.

Ask yourself this, if he were you would you want him to tell you and talk it through etc etc? If your answer is yes then tell him. But what you have also have to decide is what YOU want to do and what YOU are going to do because at the end of the day, and although this has been hard to come to terms with, it is YOUR life and you can chose who you want to love.

Just a word of caution because I can see you don't want to destroy your boyfriend. Make your decision and stick by it. That being said the more you don't do anything (which my ex did) the more your feelings will become confused, rendering a potential decision impossible to make for yourself and absolutely crushing your boyfriend especially if he has no clue.

Is it really possible to fall in love with someone else when you really love someone?! That's what I really want to know

Well I don't know what to say but this is a bit similar to my situation. My ex fell for someone at work and cheated on me and I found out and the relationship ended (see my post)... he now has a change of heart and wants to work things out. Too late as too much has happened.

My advice to you is to really sit down and work out what you have, appreciate what you have, and work out how you see your life in the future with your partner.

Communicate and communicate with your man- do little things and add the spark that you need in your relationship. A good relationship will be the result of good hard work between two people. NO way does it come on a silver platter.

If you can't do that- then let your man go- set him free as he does not deserve to be treated like this- like you said he is someone you love v much.


What ever you do - don't cheat on your man!

Quote:

---

Originally Posted by talaniman

You will meet many people you are attracted to, thats so human. What you do about it is whats important.

I suggest you stay within the bounds of good behavior, and be a loyal partner, as intense feelings, like lust, can fade as quick as they came.

---

Tal's right. When you've been in a relationship or marriage for a number of years and have felt attracted to other people at different times yet didn't act on impulse (kept your distance), you begin to realise the intensity of your feelings eventually fade until one day you find yourself not thinking about them anymore. If you value your core relationship, you owe it to your partner to remain close so the bond between you isn't lost during those times.

The sort of people you're attracted to often has something to teach you about what is missing in your life or how you want to be. If you respect those relationships and don't engage in emotional cheating (spending time with someone else or obsessing over them while ignoring your partner, or talking with them about things your partner wants or needs and deserves to hear) they can enrich your life. Who hasn't had a crush on a teacher or colleague at some point? It's perfectly natural. As Tal says, it's 'what you do about it is what's important'.

Inability to resist is a weakness. People like that find themselves giving up much of what they start in life.

And for the record, what you're talking about is infatuation.

Let me say something:
1.I don't really understand people like you at all. You stay 5 years with your boyfriend and then you want to leave him for the first guy you meet.so what about these 5 years?you are throwing them away.you must accept them. They are part of your life.

2.didnt you have butterflies in your stomach when you first met your boyfriend? Sure you had. You are just used to the relationship you are in and you think the best thing is to go with the other guy.but remember that after some time you will be in the same phase when you will meet another guy.so do you want a life like this? Going from a guy to another. RESPECT YOURSELF.
Whatever a person does, he is never going to be 100% enjoyed with his life even if he fulfills all his fantasies and passions. He always wants more and is never happy with what he has. Don't play with your life and with your boyfriend's emotions.you will get burned.