Is it normal for two people in a relationship who live together to not always sleep in the same bed? My boyfriend sleeps in the living room sometimes( we have no furniture) on the floor instead of coming to bed with me. This happens on and off , maybe 2 days out of the week on average; sometimes more. It really offends me and I argue with him every time he does it. He always has a different excuse ranging from being tired, to it being too hot, etc. I don't really believe him, but I don't understand why either..?

We don't have any children together by the way..

My boyfriend will do the same thing occasionally. It is a huge pet peeve of mine, but that it is not an indication of your relationship with him. Some men have bad habits, one being falling asleep in front of the TV at night. I wouldn't be so offended by it.

Those all sound like legit reasons to me. I remember roasting in bed, when me and my ex would sleep in the same bed. I also remember when she would kick me, elbow me, take all the blanket when it's 20 degrees outside, and hog the whole bed up. I chose to sleep downstairs or on the couch a few times, because I just wanted to get a real good nights sleep.

A friend of mine, who has been married for 6 years now, chooses to sleep on the couch at his house because his wife snores like a bear as a result of her being 8 1/2 months pregnant.

I know that sometimes I don't even sleep in my own bed, because I fall asleep in front of the TV.

It's just one of those quirks you have to learn to deal with when you live with someone. It niether reflects the relationship nor does it mean he doesn't love you.

Sometimes a man just needs some sleep!

It can put a strain on things to sleep separately, but my husband snores like a bawling bull, so he sleeps in another room. I was getting ZERO sleep and we just came to the agreement.

We both sleep better now, and still manage to get together for the important stuff!

I know a few couples married for many years who have separate bedrooms for various reasons. All of the reasons seem to point to one thing, both people being able to get a good nights sleep. Some people just can't sleep well with another person in bed with them. That doesn't mean you can't snuggle up on "date night" ;-)

Have you tried letting him have the bed and you sleeping on the couch occasionally?

It's not worth arguing and ending up with a bunch of hurt feelings over. Besides, when you're not getting a good nights sleep you're more prone to snapping at people you love for no apparent reason.
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Some people can simply not get a good nights sleep when the other is in the bed. I wouldn't read too much into it

I agree with all the above. I've been married for 13 years and once in a while hubby will sleep on the couch because he's too hot, or I'm kicking him in my sleep. It doesn't happen often, but it does happen.

Some people never get use to having another person in the bed when they sleep, it's not an indication that he loves you any less.

I get really hot in bed and sometimes I will go out to the sofa to cool down a little and I end up falling asleep. It use to make my wife very angry so one night when I sweating my @$$ off I decided to stay in bed and opened all the windows in the bed room during the middle of winter she got the point and she doesn't get mad anymore.

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Originally Posted by Altenweg

I agree with all the above. I've been married for 13 years and once in a while hubby will sleep on the couch because he's too hot, or I'm kicking him in my sleep. It doesn't happen often, but it does happen.

Some people never get use to having another person in the bed when they sleep, it's not an indication that he loves you any less.

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So you're a kicker! My fiancé is an elbow kind of gal. I have woken up quite a few times to an elbow to the head. I'm starting to think it's on purpose! Ha ha!

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Originally Posted by Romefalls19

So you're a kicker! My fiance is an elbow kind of gal. I have woken up quite a few times to an elbow to the head. I'm starting to think it's on purpose! Ha ha!

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I'm a kicker and sometimes a hitter! We went on vacation one time and stayed in a hotel. Hubby asked that they give us a wakeup call for 6am, he slept on the side of the bed where the phone was, at home the phone is on my side of the bed.

Anyway, at 6am, when the phone rang, it shocked me out of my sleep, I lunged to grab it and ended up hitting hubby in the face, I gave him a black eye!

The next hotel he asked for twin beds. :(

Ouch, wake up calls are the worst especially if you're not expecting it.

Hopefully you and the hubby are back to same beds

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Originally Posted by Romefalls19

Ouch, wake up calls are the worst especially if you're not expecting it.

Hopefully you and the hubby are back to same beds

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Well, in all fairness, he wasn't my hubby then, that was almost 20 years ago. Gulp. :eek:

For the majority of the time we do sleep in the same bed, but I can totally understand why sometimes it's nice to sleep alone. Hubby snores, I kick, and we both like different temperatures in the room when we sleep. There are times when you just really need a full 8 hours sleep! ;)

I have lived with my BF for 11 yrs. And we rarely sleep together.We adore each other and all else is good but I can't sleep next to anyone.
If everything else is working I wouldn't pay too much attention to it.
Sometimes its just a personal quirk.
Maybe you could convince him to just be with you for a little while in the bed before you fall asleep and then you could go to your own comfy spots.

This is not a big deal as couple make their own sleeping arrangement as they go. Any one seen my wife? Oh there she is in the den.

Laugh this off like everyone else does.

I have the same situation-sometimes it's just a matter of one partner "needing" perhaps a deeper sleep. Having someone next to you, especially if they toss and turn a lot, decreases sleep intensity and some people just can't deal. So yeah, I guess it's normal, I don't like it either.

Ya I agree with everyone else, sometimes it's needed to sleep on the couch or whatever.

As long as everything else is OK I wouldn't worry about it.

I find it more difficult to sleep with someone next to me and it almost always gets amazingly hot. I wouldn't read too much into it

Have you considered buying a bigger bed?