I just ended my relationship of five yrs, and the reason is because I can't trust him, he's sexually cheated on me once that I know of, I knew it, but lied and said that I should trust him, but I knew he did, and when she emailed him that what they were a mistake, he lied to me again and said that it was just oral, then he emailed her telling her that was the story to follow, and I found that too.

He repeatedly tried saying that he'd try to make it better, but every time Id try to talk about our problems, he'd keep avoiding them, ask why I bring them up, and get mad, so I'd end up blowing up at him because I got so frustrated.

So then I figured we were over, so I got into a "relationship" over the internet with a guy that called me a goddess and said I was beautiful every day, and after the issues I'd had before, it was exactly what I needed. He was paying little to no attention to me, so I didn't feel bad, I figured it was over, and this guy was soothing my wounds, I feel bad for using him though.

Anyway, he found the letters, and confronted me, I said my side of the story, and again, we decided to try yo make it work, and I did try very hard, but he went back to shutting me out, but still said that he wanted to make it work, so I decided to give him an ultimatum, finish school (working on his ged for longer then he's been with me, and was nearly done). He didn't finish. I said we are done, he needs to move out when he gets his taxes back, but I'll stay with you until then.

Well, he's all of a sudden been lovey dovey (surprised? Couldn't do it b4) but I also know he texts a girl who is unhappily married at work, and they are some dirty, flirty comments. Whatever, we are pretty much done, I'm jealous, and I still love him, but it's soon over, but then I get that feeling again, he's hiding something, he's using hundredds of texts in a week, but they are always erased when he comes home. So he's asleep and she starts txting him, I decide to pretend I'm him, and come to find out, she thinks we are broke up. So when he wakes up, I say that if he's telling people we aren't together, then we aren't.

Now he's mad at me for snooping and thinks I'm a b!tch, but these are the only times I've snooped, and both times I was right. If he'd been honest, I wouldn't have done it. I know I'm guilty, but who's truly the bad guy here.

Basically he wants his cake and eat it too. No, you are not a bad person as you tried. All he did was lie and cheat and call you nasty names. He's the one with the problem, not you.

You said you ended this relationship, but at the end of the story it sounds like you are with him again... is this true?

If so, I feel no sympathy for you. This man has shown his true colors, and as far as I am concerned, if I know I can reach into the cookie jar and not get in trouble, I will keep on doing it... time to close the lid kid!

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Originally Posted by cherilyndria

Now he's mad at me for snooping and thinks im a b!tch, but these are the only times I've snooped, and both times I was right. If he'd been honest, I wouldn't have done it. I know I'm guilty, but who's truly the bad guy here.

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Well you had no business snooping and you were the one who said "Just until taxes, cause we are through", now you are mad because he thinks you aren't together.

Don't use men to sooth away heartbreak. It's time to work on you and only worry about you. Don't worry about dating. When you are strong and know what you want you will demand respect and that is when you can get respect.