Based on the posts I have read in this forum and on what I have heard from others, I noticed something. I don't know if it is true.just asking if you have noticed it too .in 80 % of the serious relationships that ended in break ups ,the dumpers are the girls. If you think this is true, can you give reasons. Is this the nature of girls? Can't they understand the meaning of a SERIOUS relationship?Or they are always looking for a perfect man with no mistakes at all, who probably doesn't exist? I don't mean to offend any of the girls here. Im speaking in general.

That's a good question. I don't think it's just the females. It may be on this board, but I'm sure that if you went to another discussion area it would be total opposite. It could just be that the guys are just letting the stuff out more than the females are.

Ok what it is I feel that men get comfortable more quickly and it takes more for a man to break up than a woman... Women tend to over analyze everything that happens in a relationship and sometimes they talk theirsleves out of good relationship over minuscule things I admit that I broke up with guys over things that probably could have been remedied... so in conlusion sometimes yes women break up with men more often

I think that when a relationship goes long term (over 3 years in my opinion) the men usually start to think in more practical terms than the women. We aren't so interested in the romance aspect as much because it is predominantly the men who are the givers of romance while women receive it. So for us nothing has really changed except for the fact that we don't have to bend over backwards anymore (though we still do, just in different ways). So in the meanwhile, the women start to wonder if they are missing out on anything because the "spark" has gone. All the while, the men don't really feel like they are missing out by not being with other women because we know that all roads will basically lead to the same place. Not so with women. We can all thank Hollywood. Haha!

This is a good question but I don't think the answer is the same for every girl..

My opinion is that it all starts from our basic animal instincts... girls are the pretty ones that attract the males.. the males usually go a step up in dating a girl, and the girl goes a step down.. so eventually she realizes that he's not all he's cracked up to be and wants him to change to be on her level.. he doesn't and she dumps him..

I think it's as simple as that..

However, if a girl finds the right guy (her future husband) and that's in her league, then I don't think this applies..

Quote:

---

Originally Posted by plonak

This is a good question but I don't think the answer is the same for every girl..

My opinion is that it all starts from our basic animal instincts... girls are the pretty ones that attract the males.. the males usually go a step up in dating a girl, and the girl goes a step down.. so eventually she realizes that he's not all he's cracked up to be and wants him to change to be on her level.. he doesn't and she dumps him..

I think it's as simple as that..

However, if a girl finds the right guy (her future husband) and that's in her league, then I dont think this applies..

---

I think that most women have an inflated sense of self worth. This however is not based in reality but in fantasy. The discord between the real world and the fantasy land they inhabit makes them think they can do "better". So, they dump their man, and merrily go on their way looking for Mr. Perfect, all the while not taking into account that they themselves are far from perfection. Meanwhile, the man has understood this from day one (about himself as well as his woman). This results in us knowing that no woman can make us happy, but instead only enhance our happiness. While women need their man to make them happy and the personality they possess and all of their accomplishments are instead the enhancement. The only woman who is really in a mans league is that rare one who derives her self esteem from within instead of from without. I'm just speaking in generalities here. This overall lack of self-esteem drives them to keep looking for another relationship which is destined to end up the same as the last one. Mostly a lack of foresight in the case of the fairer sex.

Quote:

---

Originally Posted by itried

I think that most women have an inflated sense of self worth. This however is not based in reality but in fantasy. The discord between the real world and the fantasy land they inhabit makes them think they can do "better". So, they dump their man, and merrily go on their way looking for Mr. Perfect, all the while not taking into account that they themselves are far from perfection. Meanwhile, the man has understood this from day one (about himself as well as his woman). This results in us knowing that no woman can make us happy, but instead only enhance our happiness. While women need their man to make them happy and the personality they possess and all of their accomplishments are instead the enhancement. The only woman who is really in a mans league is that rare one who derives her self esteem from within instead of from without. I'm just speaking in generalities here. This overall lack of self-esteem drives them to keep looking for another relationship which is destined to end up the same as the last one. Mostly a lack of foresight in the case of the fairer sex.

---

Itired

This was MY opinion.. go back and read the rules as to when it's appropriate to give a reddie. I was stating my opinon

You can disagree if you like but you don't need to give me a reddie for it.. Why don't YOU get real!

Especially in long term, it seems women no offense just want the constant butterflies, the constant honeymoon period that was at the beginning at the relationship. Guys we get comfortable easily, it seems when that happens the women thinks you no longer care about her as much as you once did when that is not the case.

You both have proven why relationships are so hard to maintain.

Really?

It's because men take women for granted faster than women take men for granted, and men take the relationship itself for granted more often than women do.

Women, for the most part, are the ones that work on keepign it romantic, keeping the spark, keeping themselves interesting. Men get the girl, get sex, and get a woman in the kitchen, bedroom, and laundry room all in one--why WOULD they break up with her?

I think men are more likely to break up with women for financial or sexual problems, and women more likely to break up with men for emotional and communication problems.

And since communication is the problem most of the time, men don't see it coming, and are more likely to be blindsided by it.

Quote:

---

Originally Posted by plonak

Itired

This was MY opinion.. go back and read the rules as to when it's appropriate to give a reddie. I was stating my opinon

You can disagree if you like but you don't need to give me a reddie for it.. Why don't YOU get real!

---

Sorry you're upset. What's a reddie?

Quote:

---

Originally Posted by itried

Sorry you're upset. What's a reddie?

---

When you click on the "Rate Answer" button you can agree, or disagree with a person's answer. When you disagree, it takes a notch away from their "rep" points (called a reddie). When you "agree" it gives them points.

Carry on... :cool:

Quote:

---

Originally Posted by kctiger

When you click on the "Rate Answer" button you can agree, or disagree with a person's answer. When you disagree, it takes a notch away from their "rep" points (called a reddie). When you "agree" it gives them points.

Carry on...:cool:

---

I know about the "Rate Answer" thing. I just didn't know about the points thing. I should pay more attention to the etiquette of the site.

Quote:

---

Originally Posted by itried

I know about the "Rate Answer" thing. I just didn't know about the points thing. I should pay more attention to the etiquette of the site.

---

It is a common mistake man... no worries. You are a value contribution here, as I like your advice.

Carry on... :cool:

Also, men aren't really that open to expressing their feelings after a breakup occurs. Instead, we go out with our buddies and do anything but talk about how we feel in order to make us feel better. More often than not, it doesn't work. Meanwhile, women will get all their girlfriends together for weeks at a time to hash out every minuscule detail and feeling they have. So a healthier outlet for the release of emotions is readily available for women but not so for men. I know I haven't spoken about how I felt after breaking up with my ex to any of my buddies. Instead, it was just glossed over and treated as a minor speedbump instead of as the major life event it was. I came to this website to get all this crap off my chest without letting anyone close to me know how I was really feeling and how I actually feel about my experiences with relationships. It's just harder for guys to do this type of stuff because it's not "acceptable" conduct. Therefore, it seems like it's always women dumping men on this site because this is really one of the only places to let your feelings out and not lose some semblance of self-reliance we, as men, are supposed to have. So all the guys wind up here instead of at their buddies place crying into a glass of wine. Just my opinion.

Quote:

---

Originally Posted by itried

Also, men aren't really that open to expressing their feelings after a breakup occurs. Instead, we go out with our buddies and do anything but talk about how we feel in order to make us feel better. More often than not, it doesn't work. Meanwhile, women will get all their girlfriends together for weeks at a time to hash out every miniscule detail and feeling they have. So a healthier outlet for the release of emotions is readily available for women but not so for men. I know I haven't spoken about how I felt after breaking up with my ex to any of my buddies. Instead, it was just glossed over and treated as a minor speedbump instead of as the major life event it was. I came to this website to get all this crap off my chest without letting anyone close to me know how I was really feeling and how I actually feel about my experiences with relationships. It's just harder for guys to do this type of stuff because it's not "acceptable" conduct. Therefore, it seems like it's always women dumping men on this site because this is really one of the only places to let your feelings out and not lose some semblance of self-reliance we, as men, are supposed to have. So all the guys wind up here instead of at their buddies place crying into a glass of wine. Just my opinion.

---

I've always felt this to be the most likely reason for the phenomenon I noticed here as well.

OOOHHH Plonak. You and my ex see the world through the same twisted veil. I'll tell you what I told her. Ok we are dating a step up but if you screw this relationship up I'll find a girl that will date 2 steps down. You do the math. I know a lot of good looking guys that date ugly girls because they don't have a superiority complex. I feel sorry for every guy that ever dated you and thought they had a partner instead of a mother.

Quote:

---

Originally Posted by wolfgangqpublic

I've always felt this to be the most likely reason for the phenomenon I noticed here as well.

---

I also feel that most men are emotionally stunted and have a hard time accessing their feelings, or maybe just articulating them coherently. So another way of looking at this is that the men who do come to this site to let it out are maybe a little more sensitive and in tune with themselves than the average man. So when we get dumped or hurt or whatever, we need to somehow let it out while still maintaining our exterior.