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-   -   I think I am clueless (https://www.askmehelpdesk.com/showthread.php?t=305969)

  • Jan 19, 2009, 06:08 PM
    ss_aa_rr_aa
    I think I am clueless
    Hi..
    Well I think I have a problem..
    Some times I feel I don't have a ME..
    Most of the days I do what ever I want to do and what ever will make me happy... but lately I have been noticing that what do I really want? I donno! I know I want to be happy.. most of the days that happened by lil' sweet things.. but I donno what will really make me happy.. like a big thing.. like a goal.. or maybe something just to make me be me! Not lost every day! Trying to act like nothing is wrong.. and there is nothing wrong.. all I am saying.. is that some times I feel like goalless or empty or just donno what to do in my life.. I don't even know which sites I want to enter on the internet.. I go by the usual fun sites and fun things.. but who am I really? What do I really want! All these question I can't answer them.. is this normal! Does any one have a clue about what I am talking about?
  • Jan 19, 2009, 06:11 PM
    Nestorian
    I know what you mean I am there now myself
  • Jan 19, 2009, 06:16 PM
    Fr_Chuck

    Often it is normal at times for a lost feeling, but then it can change as one grows and has responsibilities. We understand that often it is not just about our self
  • Jan 19, 2009, 06:23 PM
    Nestorian

    I don't have much time but here is some of what I've bin looking into.

    Spirituallity, Mind, Body. These three things make up the human "Pysche" (a greek word meaning soul. ) This is my personal belief so its OK if you don't agree, I encourage you to disagree if you like. For how are we to learn with out asking questions and learning?

    I've done a lot of reading into, Psychological books, self help books, Buddhist books teachings, and my very own philosophical ideas.

    The first think I'd ask you is what is your purpose?

    Well I have to go, but send me a PM and I'll help you out as best I can, but be mindful it's more of a personal thing, but it doesn't hurt to have some one to talk to along the path. ;)
  • Jan 19, 2009, 06:32 PM
    ordinaryguy
    Quote:

    Originally Posted by ss_aa_rr_aa View Post
    but who am i really? what do i really want! all these question i can't answer them.. is this normal!

    These are deep questions, and it's normal for a young person not to have answers to them. As people get older, it's less common. It isn't usually that they find the answers, it's that they quit asking the questions. How old are you?
  • Jan 19, 2009, 06:44 PM
    ss_aa_rr_aa

    Hi guys.. thanks for the answers.. I am 20 yrs old.. well my goal is to be happy at something.. but until now I haven't found that thing! Its frustrating! I don't want to rush things.. my life is going to be a long journey I know and by time only things will be more clear to me.. but I am talking about now.. to this moment what will I do to make me feel like I am "some one" or not a no body! Does any one have any answers? Because some times its really sad because now I am on a diet! But when I am not on a diet I eat so much just bcoz I donno the answer to these questions or just bcoz I am so clueless! Thanks a lot guys for the replays
  • Jan 19, 2009, 06:59 PM
    Nestorian
    Quote:

    Originally Posted by ss_aa_rr_aa View Post
    hi guys.. thanks for the answers.. iam 20 yrs old.. well my goal is to be happy at some thing.. but until now i haven't found that thing! its frustrating! i dont want to rush things.. my life is gonna be a long journey i know and by time only things will be more clear to me.. but iam talking about now.. to this moment what will i do to make me feel like iam "some one" or not a no body! does any one have any answers? coz some times its really sad coz now iam on a diet! but when iam not on a diet i eat so much just bcoz i donno the answer to these questions or just bcoz iam so clueless! thanks alot guys for the replays

    Pretty much you seem to want to have a purpose, something to identify yourself with that makes you happy. Am I on the right track?

    You can't really decide what you want to do in life because there are just too damn many choices! I feel like that often. The best you can do is make a choice, try doing voluntering, good way to expereince things,meet people, and find a means to temporarely find a "purpose."

    Have you heard the "everybodys free to wear sun screen song"? I think it gives you a good idea as to how you may, or may not feel after high school, or even college.

    I will suggest exercising, and learning about the things you enjoy in life.

    Also, take some time to just sit on the grass and feel the grass for the grass, smell the air, look at the sky, if it's raining, go play in some puddles, if it's wintry place in the snow. Sure it's cold, wet and unpleasant, but don't let that stop you from enjoying the moment you are in.

    As master Ooguay(not sure I spelled that correct.) the big Turtle guy off Kung Fu panda.
    "The past is history, the future is a mistery and today is a gift; that is why they call it the present."- Ooguay.

    As master Yoda would say it, “The dark side clouds everything. Impossible to see the future is.”

    Eh, how's that? ;)

    Also, look at your values, and find out do you live up to them? I learned that I didn't, and now I'm trying to stick to them, and I feel better.

    peace and kindness be with you.
  • Jan 19, 2009, 07:22 PM
    ss_aa_rr_aa

    thank u so much Nestorian your words really touched my heart.. even the song did.. I think there is a side of me I had been ignoring it so much for the past year or two.. the imagining side and believing in things.. I stopped doing that from long time ago.. I guess I should be sorry for myself for doing that to myself.. but regret won't do much! So I'll start living my life just the way u told me to.. and with my values as well :) thank u so much sweetie.. have a lovely day
  • Jan 20, 2009, 12:27 AM
    Nestorian
    Quote:

    Originally Posted by ss_aa_rr_aa View Post
    thank u so much Nestorian ur words really touched my heart.. even the song did.. i think there is a side of me i had been ignoring it so much for the past year or two.. the imagining side and believing in things.. i stopped doing that from long time ago.. i guess i should be sorry for my self for doing that to my self.. but regret won't do much! so i'll start living my life just the way u told me to.. and with my values as well :) thank u so much sweetie.. have a lovely day

    I'm not sure what to say,"...seeing you alive, brings warm feelings to my heart."- Yoda
    Yes I’m cheesy. :o Meh.
    Please do drop us a line from time to time it would be cool to hear how you are going.;)

    Take care of yourself eh!

    Peace and kindness.

    P.S. I'm not sure what you're into it, but I find it's rather comforting to listen to. It's not for every one though so don't feel bad if you don’t like it, OK. :)

    YouTube - Wisdom of the Buddha
  • Jan 20, 2009, 08:56 AM
    TexasParent

    You sound like an unselfish person trapped in an idea that you need something to be fulfilled or happy. The problem with that notion is that none of us is truly happy or fulfilled even if we reach our goals or obtain those things that we want.

    My suggestion is for you to find a vehicle in which you can give of yourself; whether that be through volunteering, or serving at a church or at community events, etc. Something to help you feel like you are connected to the human race and that you are making a difference.

    It's only through giving do we truly receive, not only in action but in thought too. I think you will find what you are looking for when you give it to others.

    Good luck.
  • Jan 20, 2009, 09:43 AM
    cozyk
    Quote:

    Originally Posted by Nestorian View Post
    I dont' have much time but here is some of what i've bin looking into.

    Spirituallity, Mind, Body. These three things make up the human "Pysche" (a greek word meaning soul. ) This is my personal belief so its ok if you don't agree, i encourage you to disagree if you like. For how are we to learn with out asking questions and learning??

    I've done a lot of reading into, Psychological books, self help books, Buddhist books teachings, and my very own philisophical ideas.

    The first think i'd ask you is what is your purpose??

    well i have to go, but send me a PM and i'll help you out as best i can, but be mindful it's more of a personal thing, but it doesn't hurt to have some one to talk to along the path. ;)

    Exactly! You can PM me too. I would be willing to bet that a HUGE percentage of the population has ask themselves this question at one time or another. I know I have, and not just once, but I'm here to tell you that YOU CAN get a sense of who you are at the core, and when you do, make sure you like that person. You have the power. I really came a long way when I started delving into self help books. Not religious ones but spiritual growth ones. You get to know who you are underneath the egoic layers.
    Basically, I've been there, done that and I'm happy to help other people find their true
    "self". You are experiencing the "Is this all there is syndrome?" Quite natural.
  • Jan 21, 2009, 11:52 PM
    ss_aa_rr_aa

    Hi TexasParent and Cozyk thanks for the replay.. well as you all said maybe I will try to do that.. being nice to others.. thinking happily and positively so maybe I'll get things out of being like this.. things that I will like.. like self ID.. but still I feel lost I still want to know more about what can I do.. I am going to read books (self improvement books).. I hope I will stop feeling lost.. but I am so much butter than the time I sent my problem to this site.. which is good :) thank you guys for all the help
  • Jan 22, 2009, 06:10 AM
    cozyk

    Thanks Nest for the warning.

    Sara, I just reread some of the posts and I was struck by the fact that you are only 20 years old. Actually, you are wise beyond your years. You have the "awareness" that you are not experiencing joy in your soul. That awareness is you higher self. That awareness is the observer in you. Most people your age and even much older are still living at such a shallow level that
    Their own identity is what their peers tell them it is. Pat yourself on the back for the ability to see there is more to you than that.
  • Jan 22, 2009, 08:50 PM
    ss_aa_rr_aa

    Thank u cozyk ;)

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