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-   -   I get so protected over the guy I like. (https://www.askmehelpdesk.com/showthread.php?t=305119)

  • Jan 18, 2009, 12:10 AM
    barbiechick123
    I get so protected over the guy I like.
    Ok, so I like a guy A lot and I think he may like me, he really shows it.. I talk to him sometimes, so it's all good.. but when I see him talking to other girls, even when they start it, I get this raging feeling of jealousy and even a little territorial, and I'm not even dating him... I know this is wrong because he isn't mine and even if he was he is allowed to have aquaintences but I just can't help but feel cynical :(.
  • Jan 18, 2009, 05:08 AM
    N0help4u

    Sounds like maybe you need to back off and leave him alone until you can get over this otherwise he most likely will sense it and get scared off,
    Jealousy is usually a real turn off to a guy, especially when it is a control type thing, If you were to start dating him it most likely would make him hate you eventually so better to get your emotions and perspective in order first.
  • Jan 18, 2009, 10:32 PM
    411Help

    This is a problem you have to address before you date ANYBODY.

    Going into a relationship with that much jealousy and insecurity will create all sorts of problems for you.

    Find the root of the problem, then fix it.
  • Jan 19, 2009, 04:52 PM
    barbiechick123

    Thank you... and yes I know it's a problem, that's why I came here :).
  • Jan 19, 2009, 05:45 PM
    TexasParent

    If you like him, why don't you tell him? All this sitting back and hoping he doesn't make a decision to date another girl is making you crazy, but it's your indecision that causing your anxiety.

    It's like me going to the mall and seeing an item on sale that I love, but it's the last one and I'm waiting for someone to bring me some cash to buy it, but all these other people are picking it up and looking at it.

    If you were in a relationship with this guy would you feel this insecure? Perhaps not once you got to know him and he professed his devotion to you. If you start to date exclusively that's when you have to let go and allow him to be who he is, if that includes having female friends, that's cool so long as you know you are the only one he's intimate with and you're his girlfriend.

    So stop sitting on the fence and go for it. Is there a risk, of course. But with risk comes rewards. If he says no, you will know where you stand and you will likely be less vexed about the whole talking to other girls thing and may end up supporting him as a friend.

    Remember either you end up buying the item or someone else will ;)

    P.S. Don't let your fear stop you. You would be surprised how many guys are dying for a girl to simply tell them they like them and would like to spend more time with them and get to know them better. Why is it that the guy must choose; who says the girl can't?
  • Jan 19, 2009, 05:55 PM
    Nestorian
    Quote:

    Originally Posted by barbiechick123 View Post
    Ok, so I like a guy ALOT and i think he may like me, he really shows it.. I talk to him sometimes, so it's all good.. but when I see him talking to other girls, even when they start it, I get this raging feeling of jealousy and even a little territorial, and im not even dating him... I know this is wrong because he isn't mine and even if he was he is allowed to have aquaintences but I just can't help but feel cynical :(.

    “Fear is the path to the dark side. Fear leads to anger. Anger leads to hate. Hate leads to suffering.”--Yoda

    Why fear, because you are obviously afraid to loose him, but you should be ware that which we would hold most presiously, and tightly would most definitely leave first chance it got. But those we hold lovingly/ kindly, with a soft caress is free to go true, but also is more likely to love you in returen.

    I know there is a saying I don't know where, or who said it, so if you do please let me know. Thanks. Also, I know its plagirism. To state thee a bove with out reffrence to the originator of the idea.


    Sister, do you love yourself? Do you think you are attractive? Why?

    Peace and kindness

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