I want to be able to feel like I belong, that I'm not some outsider. I want to be able to trust people and let them now what I really think not what I think they want to hear. I'm afraid of getting hurt, and hurting others. I need to get pass this electric fence in front of me. I'm tired of always being depressed, please help.

Well then just be a listener with an open heart to help. You don't have to share your life or your experiences until you do trust and that takes time.

However you can always have the heart to give to others, and when you give, others will trust you.

You see if all our relationships depended on what we received from them we would never be fulfilled, people would always disappoint and lose our trust somehow. However if we are a giver in friendships without expecting anything in return, how can we be disappointed, how can someone betray our trust, they can't.

The point is to love; if you love you will receive it back 10 times over without asking. However if you are seeking love, belonging, acceptance you will never be fulfilled so long as you look to others for it, because the truth is that only you or God (if you believe in God) can love you enough to fulfill the emptiness inside.

What most people don't realize is that in order to love yourself you need to learn to love others without judgement. When you learn to do that, then you can apply that same love to yourself, without judgement.

Don't be critical, don't talk about others badly, don't gossip; instead if you talk about others praise them, talk only about the good things in people, do not reveal things told to you inconfidence and don't share anything you can't have repeated to others. Look at the good in people more often that you see the negative.

If you act this way, people will be running to you to have a friendship. Be the friend to others that you would want in a friend to you, and you will attract better more trustworthy friends in your life.

It starts with you being that loving, non-judgemental, always finding the good, non-gossiping, trustworthy person. You will find in a short time that your life and your friendships will change when you choose to love, rather than seeking to be loved.

I'm a great listener and maybe if I feel like I'm able to come out of my shell I'll give you some advise or something but that's not my problem

I'm afraid to open up, my dad-father ruined my trust in people and I can't find a way back.

What is it you are afraid of? What trust is betrayed when you open up? What is it that you need to trust people with which comes back to haunt you?

I don't really know, I mean I'm afraid if I open up then the people close to me will betray me and claim I'm either a liar or one of the othe things my dad has called me.:(