My girlfriend is 7 months pregnant, with a 28 yr olds kid, I started dating her when she was 9 and half weeks, we been dating for almost 5 months, and it seems like whole time we get in big fights, I love her lots, and I want things to work out but lately, I've been thinking, that this baby is going to cut our relationship short. And I get grouchy when ever I think about that she having someone' else's kid and not mine. Am I just stressing myself out? I recently told my girlfriend my feelings about this, and saying , maybe you can think of options like adoption, and to make a choice that will benefit her, and that will work for "us" or what her plans are for this relationship , and she didn't react well. She said she put her baby before me and that she keeping the baby. But when we first started dating she was going to get an abortion to have a kid with me if I got a sperm count but I never made the appoinment so here we are now. I want to be with her, but I hope this doesn't get bad to the point we break up in bad bad terms, wats your thoughts?

You are selfish and the best thing she can do in her life is to dump you and find someone that will truly love her and accept her.

Wow, basically telling her to give up her child for you. How selfish are you? Any good mother, hell any decent mother would put their child, unborn or born, before a guy, especially one she's only been with for 5 months. You don't have a leg to stand on, she should drop you and enjoy this time in her life of bringing another life into the world.

You want to be with her on your terms, and they are completely selfish and uncaring.

Accept her, and support her, or leave her alone. You are be a lousy b/f, and father to be. This child doesn't deserve that so disappear.

Oh My God- you're a sick and a horrible selfish creature! How can you think a mother would leave a child??
If you were that bothered about the child not being yours - why the hell did you date the woman??
I hope the woman DUMPS you, you deserve it

Before I start throwing insults around, did you know she was pregnant when you started dating her?

If you did, you accepted it then, why can't you now?

If not, why didn't you break off the relationship when you found out?

As of this moment, there is no "us" in the equation. It is her and the baby... the decision is hers and hers ALONE what to do with this child. You need to keep your nose out of it.

Either you accept it, or you don't. If you accept it, stand up and be a man, if you don't then time to walk away because this relationship will NEVER work out.

Granted, it is selfish to ask her to give the baby up, but I'm not sure you've really done that. Even though this is not your baby, if you love the mother, and commit to help her with parenting, you will be the only thing the baby knows as a real father. Even though s/he isn't your flesh and blood, you can grow to love this child just as if s/he were.

If she was considering having an abortion, and now wants to keep the child, then she has obviously had a change of heart as well. It's easy to think of a 9 week fetus as just a cluster of cells, but now she's probably been feeling the baby kick for months, and it becomes a little more real for her. You can't expect her to give up the child when she has already bonded with it.

No matter what anyone says, and no matter who the real father is, the possibility of a child damaging the relationship is always in the back of an expectant father's mind. In cases where the couple are right for each other and love each other, the opposite happens. Raising a child can be the single most important bonding experience for a couple. More important than sex or marriage.

One reason you might be having big fights is that her hormones might be raging right now. If you're not sensitive to changes in her mood, then you could get a tongue lashing. As long as the fights never get physical, I'd say you can probably tough it out.

In the end, if you are committed to this woman, you can both be very happy, and maybe even have a child together later. I don't think you're a monster; I think you need a crash course in what it means to be a good partner.

You must have known she was pregnant when you met her, correct?

If so, how come all of a sudden, this is a problem?

You asking her to give up her baby for you is not only selfish but immoral.

Yes, I Do understand this is pretty selfish, I'm pretty sure when the baby comes and I see it for the first time, I will regret any negative thought I had towards her. Her hormones are raging, And I just want to be the best boyfriend I can be, and the best father figure, we haven't been really spending time together like we should be like enjoying each other's company, and it is partially my fault. I would like to lift this girl off her feet, and show her what a good guy I really am, any advice on things me and her can do together, what I should do when she snaps on me.( I always feel the need to mouth back and I know that will make things worse). Again thanks.

You already know what to do, stop mouthing off. Pregnant females need to vent and that's when you shut up. Its tough, but its tougher on her.