Please Please help me on this one.. its totally driving me crazy, also getting me really upset.
Im male, 25, she female 20. We have been together for about a year, engaged, due to marry in 2011.
We used to have a good sex life when we first met, but since we have moved in together, our sex life has some what disapered. From having it 3 times a week, now I'd be lucky for once a month. I know a relationship isn't based, and shouldn't be based on sex, and were still both young, no kids, so therefore surely we should be enjoying a happy and healthy sex life. I have tried talking to her about it, but all I get is the cold shoulder, and she says that's all blokes want, but she knows I'm a decent lad, otherwise I wouldn't have asked her to marry me. (she said yes of course) new yrs eve! I know you're probably thinking perhaps I shouldn't have really done it with this on my mind, but I truly do deeply love this girl, and wish to spend the rest of my life with her. But at the end of the day I had to follow my heart. But this is one problem I do want to solve as its stressing me out and making me feel unloved and unwanted..
When I even try it on with her in bed, she always refuses, leaving me sobbing in bed (which she doesn't know about).
I don't know how to solve this problem as I have tried talking to her, and its not became of anything, now I have things playing on my mind, maybe she is getting it elsewhere, or maybe she doesn't fancy me anymore... yet I'm a good looking bloke with a fit body and have many people comment on that.
Now I'm contimplating the facts, she is rejecting it when I want it, yet the only time we have sex is when she wants it... so maybe, I should forget trying it on with her, when she wants it, refuse it to her...
I know this is going to lead to a non sexual relationship, but can anyone else come up with another idea??
And even though I love her so much, cheating with someone else to get what I am missing might sound like a good idea, but my heart tells me not to do it as I have been out since and had the offers but not been able to carry them out.. maybe a bit of harsh thinking I could probably do this...
I just need some advice.. I love my girlfriend so much, the last thing I want is to cheat on her, and for us to split up.
J xx