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-   -   My boyfriend says I need to lose weight (https://www.askmehelpdesk.com/showthread.php?t=300065)

  • Jan 6, 2009, 05:12 PM
    forever123
    My boyfriend says I need to lose weight
    My boyfriend and I have been dating for a year and a half and about 8 months ago he told me it looks like I have gained weight. I was so hurt by this. I am 5'5 and weigh 140 lbs. I have never had anyone say anything like that to me before and I have always considered myself a little thick but never too big. He knew it upset me and I told him if he doesn't like it he can leave. He apologized and everything seemed OK. He played football in college and is still in great shape he goes to the gym 5 times a week. And sometimes it seems to me that he is obsessed with weight. Of course I want to be healthy and fit but I have never been obsessed with my weight. One night we were watching the Kimora Simmons show and he said her two little daughters look chunky. I was apalled and we got in an argument about it. Then I would say within the past 3 weeks he has said things like you face looks chubby, he will grab my upper arm and say we need to work on this, your face is so round or he calls my behind burritos saying the burritos are hungry. I have just said shut up and laugh. But it really does hurt and I hate changing in front of him or eating too much in front of him. I don't know what to do. I have never heard comments like this about myself and I don't really want to talk to any of my family members or friends about this. Is this emotional abuse? What should I do? I don't really want to let him know he is getting to me or I am insecure about it but I don't know what to do?
  • Jan 7, 2009, 12:47 AM
    Cooledit

    Hi, forever123

    According to normal BMI your just 23.5 in the normal range, so it's up to you to find out if you want to keep this boyfriend of yours or let him go. Of cause there is also the other way to start workout if if you feel like it and then when you get the body you want then you leave him haha. I think he is a fool either he loves you or he doesn't. He should like you for whom you are and not the looks but I guess you're both young still below 30 is my guess.

    Some people seems only to go for the looks. So maybe you just need some vacation from each other. Does your boyfriend has a six pack stomach?? If not tell him you want such one
  • Jan 7, 2009, 02:25 AM
    justcurious55

    Wow. Set him straight or get rid of him. Even if you did have a weight problem, and it sounds like you don't, that would not be an appropriate way to talk to you or anyone else about it. It sounds like he has some issues of his own. You told him he can accept you or leave, now you have to enforce that. Either he stops making rude inappropriate comments or its time for him to go.

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