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-   -   My boyfriend not performing well in bed (https://www.askmehelpdesk.com/showthread.php?t=299526)

  • Jan 5, 2009, 03:44 PM
    Linnette1973
    My boyfriend not performing well in bed
    I've been dating my boyfriend for 9 months now. I have complained to him several times about him not kissing( he's a pecker no tongue kissing ever), he doesn't look at me during sex (he claims he does) he doesn't touch my body at all no foreplay and we only have sex once a week. When I was seeing him 3 to 4 times a week it was no different so I just go over once a week. Every time I try to wear lingerie he just says you look nice and finish watching the game. I am very attractive and have a lot of guys wanting to date me even my ex-boyfriends are wanting to get back with me but my current boyfriend seems uninterested I want to break it off he leaves me no alternative.
  • Jan 5, 2009, 03:54 PM
    ja77

    This does not sound like a relationship -

    It sounds like it is more about the sex to you than anything else ?

    Have you tried instead of putting your boyfriend down to have a honest talk with him about your issue's.
  • Jan 5, 2009, 03:58 PM
    Nestorian

    Well now that is a bit of a lame situation. Have you told him when you're not having sex, about these things. Also when a girl gets off and your inside her, yeah, you know. That whole area contracts, making it feel so damn good. So tell him if you get to the big O, then he'll feel a lot better O. And forplay is a big part of that. Have you tried making a game of it? Or bringing chocolate or whipcream in, Bow Chicka Bow wow. ;)

    Some times you have to teach a guy what you want. Like kissing. But if you are not happy, and he isn't paying you much attention, yes feel guilt free to leave. But try not to rub it in, that's just not cool. (not that you would, just saying.)

    It's really up to you though. What do you want?

    Peace be with you.
  • Jan 5, 2009, 04:12 PM
    Wondergirl

    Is it possibe he's a high-functioning autistic? Many of them do not like to touch or be touched, prefer kissing only as brief pecks, can be very focused on one thing and don't like to be interrupted, do not understand how to be romantic and make love and be passionate (sex is only a functional and obligatory thing), do not notice your new haircut or sexy lingerie, and do not make good eye contact.

    This "attitude" then could be something that he has no control over and, in fact, has no clue as to what you are talking or complaining about--and may have no interest in "fixing" something he doesn't understand is "broken."
  • Jan 5, 2009, 09:49 PM
    Choux

    When you are dating, never stay with someone who is not demonstrative in matters of love and sexual relations.

    In life, you are looking for a good mate in life so you can maximize *your happiness*... you don't want to take on a project, a guy that you have to try to fix... you have to reject those who don't measure up, or you will risk months and years of unhappiness and unnecessary *conflict*.

    Your goal in life is to be happy. Make good decisions. :)

    Best wishes,
  • Jan 6, 2009, 10:56 AM
    smoothy
    Here is a question... why do you sleep or even waste time with a guy like this? He's a project, not a boyfriend.
  • Jan 6, 2009, 02:34 PM
    chrissymarie

    Ughhh! Break it off. He doesn't care about you at all! Sex isn't only for him to enjoy... it's for you too and if he doesn't see that he simply does not care for you.

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