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-   -   I love her but I can't tell if she feels the same way (https://www.askmehelpdesk.com/showthread.php?t=296952)

  • Dec 29, 2008, 11:58 PM
    iluvher8888
    I love her but I can't tell if she feels the same way
    Hey I really need help I have not been in a relationship for a while and I have known this girl for about ten years. She is really pretty and I can not stop thinking about her. She does not go to my school but I see her like 3-4 times a month. I did not really have any feelings for her until this year because she started to flirt with me a lot. She does however have a boyfriend but I do not know if the relationship is good or bad. Sometimes she ignores me and sometimes she flirts with me. She drives me nuts. I just had a crush on her but then I started to have very strong feelings for her. I don't know if I should tell her how I feel because I don't want her to think that I am weird and have our friendship be awkward. It really hurts me to think that someone else could be with her because I want to be with her. I really can't tell if she has feelings for me because of her on and off flirting. When she flirts with me she smiles at me and laughs when I tease her and she teases me back. But sometimes she seems to ignore me and then I feel distant from her which I do not like. Should I wait to tell her how I feel or should I tell her the next time I see her? PLEASE HELP I NEED ADVISE BAD BECAUSE EVERY MOMENT I AM NOT WITH HER I AM IN PAIN!! :(
  • Dec 30, 2008, 09:18 AM
    talaniman

    You had better learn to cope with your feelings in a positive way, as she is off limits buddy, but if you want to express yourself, and be rejected, and maybe lose this friendship, go right ahead.

    I don't think she feels the same as you do, and I think your letting your feelings control your actions and it should be the other way around, as you have no control over her feelings at all.

    I say leave her alone for now, while you get yourself under control.
  • Dec 30, 2008, 11:04 AM
    Sweet_Guy23

    There are three qualities that a man should always have: CONFIDENCE, CHALLENGE, AND SELF-CONTROL...

    SELF-CONTROL..! Control your emotions, she's not available... so accept that. And don't rush into rejection.
  • Dec 30, 2008, 11:12 AM
    iluvher8888
    Ok thanks so basically you think I should wait and just be her friend for now and not tell her how I feel. If she breaks up with her boyfriend do you think I should tell her then?
  • Dec 30, 2008, 11:30 AM
    starbuck8

    If she breaks up with her boyfriend, let her know that you will be a "friend" if she needs one. Don't rush in and be the fall back guy, thinking you are going to be her knight in shining armour, who picks her up and carries her away! Be her friend and don't jump into that with expectations.

    This sounds like the classic case of wanting something you can't have! The thrill of that makes you want her even more. Right now she is in a relationship. You can hope and wish all you want, it doesn't mean it will be. Date other girls, and get yourself involved in other things instead of pining away waiting to see if her relationship will end.

    You said yourself that you don't know if their relationship is good or bad, so why sit and wait for someone that could be perfectly happy with the guy she's with!

    Maybe when she is single, and the time is right, you can then tell her your feelings and see how she feels.

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