My depression is wanting me to commit suicide
Ill start with this..
I'm 20. I was living in Toronto for 19 years of my life and I moved to Montreal right before I turned 20.
In Toronto in my high school I stopped talking to everybody that I used to hang out with. Everything got old and there was nothing left in the groups. Everybody split up.
I don't talk to anybody in my high school so when I graduated I took a year off and worked and did not have much social contact as I did in high school
I then applied to college in montreal and was accepted.
The colleges in montreal are nothing what they are in toronto and they are full of 17 year olds. I just happened to be accepted to a college far out of montreal and everybody in that school is from the way different areas of montreal
I don't have any friends in that school I hang out with on the weekdays or weekends. The people I know in that school are just school friends
I basically have nobody in montreal and toronto in terms of friends
I'm into all the cool things I dj I have ambitions but I have no met any people with the same passions as I have.
All I have in montreal is a girlfriend which I'm going through a really tough time right now with her wanting a break to think if she wants to be with me which is looking bleak.
If she decides our relationship is not working out then I have nobody.
I work a night club job and I don't have any friends in that job I hang out with
I sit in my room every day and never get to go out to parties.
I do actually know 1 person in this city I've hung out with but his crowed is different than what I'm used to and they all do drugs... etc... they are bums
So I have no friends in this city. If my girlfriend ends it fully then I won't be able to continue at my college I'm at now.
I'm in a pile of a mess
And I can't find my way out
I'm seriously depressed
All I want is my girlfriend back
I don't know what to do
I want to commit suicide but I'm to scared to.