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-   -   Flirting, a waste of time? (https://www.askmehelpdesk.com/showthread.php?t=295921)

  • Dec 26, 2008, 05:12 PM
    AandZ4ever
    Flirting, a waste of time?
    Hey I'm 16 love a 17 yr old named jake. I don't flirt so I haven't ever had a boyfriend. I find flirting stupid yet the girls who do get all the guys. I am just me all the time, so guys don't like originality? I'm not going to dumb myself down to make somebody like me. I'm pretty and smart and me. Why haven't I had a boyfriend?
  • Dec 26, 2008, 05:18 PM
    cbsf

    No, don't dumb yourself down, make the guys smarten themselves up. You're very young and have a lot to experience yet. You will meet many, many guys unlike you haven't met up till now, and what's more, you're changing and they are changing.
  • Dec 26, 2008, 09:05 PM
    AandZ4ever

    Thanks!
  • Dec 27, 2008, 10:58 AM
    AManWithNoName

    If you want to get a guy, your going to hafta flirt, but, be sudle, don't make it look like your flirting, does that make sense
  • Dec 28, 2008, 12:41 AM
    AandZ4ever

    I guess? But why should I flirt? Its always up to the girl I'm tired of it
  • Dec 28, 2008, 12:50 AM
    J_Nannen

    In our society, guys tend to expect flirty, easy to talk to and get ahold of girls. It's sad, but the truth. Also in our society, normally it's the girl who must initiate the flirting, because if a guy does initiate it and the girl isn't into it, there's a couple things that could happen: He could be called out for sexual harassment depending on how he flirts, or he could be labelled as a creep, etc.

    Normally the girls flirt because that lets the guy know that a girl is interested in him. In which case, after he knows, he would probably start to flirt back.

    As for dumbing yourself down to flirt, flirting is really just a way of saying "I like you". You don't have to make yourself seem like an easy girl to flirt. Plenty of women know how to flirt and still be self-respecting towards themselves. I myself don't find REALLY flirting, easy girls to be attractive. So be yourself!
  • Dec 28, 2008, 12:56 AM
    AManWithNoName
    Quote:

    Originally Posted by AandZ4ever View Post
    i guess? but why should i flirt? its always up to the girl im tired of it

    Not allways, it only seems that way, when you flirt, don't flirt, understand, do it, but at the same time, make it seem like your not doing it
  • Dec 31, 2008, 02:47 PM
    AandZ4ever

    That is so stupid. We live in such a sexist world!
  • Jan 4, 2009, 02:03 AM
    engee182

    It is sexist, but it goes both ways.

    I absolutely agree with J_Nannen. Flirting doesn't necessarily have to mean anything, its just a way of putting yourself out there. Originality is always good, as is being yourself. But maybe you could mold your originality into your own way of flirting with him? Letting him know you're interested. That'll help.
  • Jan 4, 2009, 02:36 AM
    compsavvyimnot
    Hmmm... Maybe the girls your age are dumbing themselves. But please know that "flirting" isn't a bad thing. It just may mean that they don't have the experience to do it the right way.
    You can be yourself and still show the boy that you're interested. Since you don't usually flirt, just a little extra attention from you might do it. Just something to make him think "she doesn't do that or act like that towards other guys". Maybe something that shows you've thought about him.
    Most impotantly, BE YOURSELF.

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