My two year old daughter doesn't seem to want to mind what I or her father says. She's always getting into stuff and climbing onto things. I'm afraid that she's going to get hurt or hurt her siblings. She seems as though she wants to get in trouble so she can get some attention. Me and her father try everything to try to displine her but don't get no results. What do I need to do to stop all this outrtage?

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Originally Posted by liltazitch23200

My two year old daughter doesn't seem to want to mind what i or her father says. She's always getting into stuff and climbing onto things. I'm afraid that she's gonna get hurt or hurt her siblings. She seems as though she wants to get in trouble so she can get some attention. Me and her father try everything to try to displine her but don't get no results. What do I need to do to stop all this outrtage?

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If it's bad behavior for the sake of attention, maybe you have to carve out extra time for her (and I know it's hard when there are other children) and misbehavior is handled simply and immediately by a time out, by herself. No big fuss, no special attention, just a "That is bad" and off to sit in a chair or some other place for a time out.

Have you tried a spanking?

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Originally Posted by 450donn

Have you tried a spanking?

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Probably not unless she wants to be arrested - I have no idea what the "political climate" on spanking is but I don't like to see any adult, outweighing a child by at least 100 pounds, striking a child.

Did not say beating. I see nothing wrong with spanking as a form of punishment for an unruly child.

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Originally Posted by 450donn

Did not say beating. I see nothing wrong with spanking as a form of punishment for an unruly child.

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I didn't say beating either. I said I don't see the point of a person who outweighs a child by easily 100 pounds striking the child. I thought I was clear about any type of striking/hitting - parhaps I was not.

Everyone has a different child rearing technique and we don't agree on this one.

Obviously you don't see anything wrong with spanking or you wouldn't have posted this. I'm saying that if that spanking leaves a mark and is reported the parent could be arrested. I will also add that people very often strike/spank in anger and hit far harder than they intended.

I think hitting a child teaches a child to hit - but, again, we don't agree and we both know it.

You may not see anything wrong with spanking but many people will turn you over to children's services for a simple smack. They say it is abuse to even touch a kid with a simple smack.
They told me that my old boyfriend was abusing my kids for playing IT tag.
They said that was even abuse his being an adult.

Spanking defiant kids really works against you anyway because that is even more negative attention and they thrive on it as well as use it to justify their behavior as well as thinking it is okay for them to hit too.

Usually as Judy says they are looking for attention and see that acting up gives them more attention than being a good kid so they end up thriving on negative attention.

Sorry you see it like that. Personally I think that sort of psyco babble is exactly why we have so many unruly and out of control people in our society today. But like you pointed out already we have different opinions about child rearing and the out come from that. BTW, one of my girls is a social worker and the other is a MA and both have kids of their own and they got swatted as necessary with no long tern effects. Can not say the same for a lot of kids that were coddled.

It is not that we see it that way.
Society has imposed a lot of what is acceptable and not acceptable on us. Also raising an attention deficit kid is a lot different than raising kids that do not have problems.
I have been through it and seen it. I know it is real and I know it is not the parents.

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Originally Posted by 450donn

Sorry you see it like that. Personally I think that sort of psyco babble is exactly why we have so many unruly and out of control people in our society today. But like you pointed out already we have different opinions about child rearing and the out come from that. BTW, one of my girls is a social worker and the other is a MA and both have kids of their own and they got swatted as necessary with no long tern effects. Can not say the same for a lot of kids that were coddled.

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Donn, I have always answered you with respect and find your response that I am quoting psycho babble to be insulting and demeaning and, quite frankly, beneath the person I thought you are.

If you want to discuss your opinion vs mine, I have no problem, but I did not find it necessary to insult you and would ask the same consideration and professionalism in return.

I fail to see how your girls' professions are connected with how they were disciplined as children.

I do see you also recommend allowing school principals to strike children as part of reclaiming our Cities so I would assume you have no problem with other people using corporal punishment on your children and grandchildren? Authority - such as being a school principal - does not mean that person is either stable or reasonable or that your rules and theirs are the same.

Sorry you took offense, but your comment
"I didn't say beating either. I said I don't see the point of a person who outweighs a child by easily 100 pounds striking the child. I thought I was clear about any type of striking/hitting - parhaps I was not." just seemed like so much psyco babble to me. Maybe you that believe in the Dr.Spock theory of raising children need to look at what happened in his own family after raising his child that way. Or how about the children of some of the others that spout this dribble about no spanking and believe in coddling kids today. Return to a moral society and raise your children to love and respect their elders and God and you would see a dramatic drop in the problems in our society. If you don't believe that then the discussion is over.

I think he was referring to us 'falling' for the Politically Correct psycho babble that society pushes than US. In either case the 'psycho babble is the general rule of society no matter how much or how little we agree with it.
I know kids are having serious behavior problems by the age of 2 and I really think it is more nutrition based and so forth. Mothers do not take prenatal vitamins. The baby was often conceived of at least one parent taking drugs, street or prescribed, lack of proper diet, lack of omega fatty acid, food allergies, environmental allergies, etc...

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Originally Posted by 450donn

Sorry you took offense, but your comment
"I didn't say beating either. I said I don't see the point of a person who outweighs a child by easily 100 pounds striking the child. I thought I was clear about any type of striking/hitting - parhaps I was not." just seemed like so much psyco babble to me. Maybe you that believe in the Dr.Spock theory of raising children need to look at what happened in his own family after raising his child that way. Or how about the children of some of the others that spout this dribble about no spanking and believe in coddling kids today. Return to a moral society and raise your children to love and respect their elders and God and you would see a dramatic drop in the problems in our society. If you don't believe that then the discussion is over.

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Well, then I guess the discussion is over.

I would be upset if a principal or another adult spanked my child. They are not the parent... therefore they cannot decide how to discipline the child.

However, I see nothing wrong with a spanking here and there AS THE PARENT. It teaches them that what they are doing is wrong a lot better than other things. I think they see it as, wow mom or dad means business. I don't want that again.

If they do not stop their ways, then obviously the spanking is not working and should be stopped.

NO BELTS... that is just wrong.

Well my mother did this with all of her kids and believe it or not it works. She gave us a spoonful of Cod Liver Oil, it's a vitamin so its good for you, but it's the absolute most vile thing I have ever tasted in my life. And then we would think she was being nice to us when she offered a soda. To bad it makes you burp, and you can taste the cod liver oil every time you burped. And then with us girls, she used to tell us it would make your hair fall out if you had too much, adding another reason why we didn't want it. Its only like 6 dollars for a bottle you minus well give it a shot.

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Originally Posted by ikryspy

Well my mother did this with all of her kids and believe it or not it works. She gave us a spoonful of Cod Liver Oil, its a vitamin so its good for you, but its the absolute most vile thing i have ever tasted in my life. And then we would think she was being nice to us when she offered a soda. To bad it makes you burp, and you can taste the cod liver oil every time you burped. And then with us girls, she used to tell us it would make your hair fall out if you had to much, adding another reason why we didnt want it. Its only like 6 dollars for a bottle you minus well give it a shot.

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Exactly what I am talking about with nutrition. Kids lack fish oil (omega) and that is a large part of why they are acting out.

My mom gave me cod liver oil pills that actually tasted like candy. I don't remember what namebrand they were. I just remember they were orange.

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Originally Posted by N0help4u

I think he was referring to us 'falling' for the Politically Correct psycho babble that society pushes than US. In either case the 'psycho babble is the general rule of society no matter how much or how little we agree with it.
I know kids are having serious behavior problems by the age of 2 and I really think it is more nutrition based and so forth. Mothers do not take prenatal vitamins. The baby was often conceived of at least one parent taking drugs, street or prescribed, lack of proper diet, lack of omega fatty acid, food allergies, environmental allergies, etc....

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And you have single mothers with more than one child, often different absentee fathers, drugs, women who have to work, those same single mothers who are struggling every day - and the list goes on.

My Grandfather felt society was coming to an end due to Elvis Presley's gyrations; my father thought it was all due to the Beatles. Me, I'm not so sure.

The next time an Attorney calls me on a child abuse case I will remember this thread - and I do get to interview family members, neighbors with an ax to grind, teachers.

I agree Judy, there are a lot of factors but I KNOW that kids with attention deficit can not be disciplined the same way as other kids and expect to get the same results.

Judy, no help,
We were not discussing children with mental or physical problems. At least I did not think so. The lack of disclipin along with the lack or real parents in a household have contributed to many of the problems we see in our society today. Ask any adult over the age of 60 how behavioral problems were handled in schools and at home. You will see that there is a dramatic difference. Also look at the number of problems our society had during the time these 60 year old's were growing up. They pail compared to today's problems. I do not believe than a good spanking will solve all of a child's problems, however when everything else has failed and a child is still unruly then maybe a good swat on the behind would get their attention. That is the point I was trying to get across.
Like I said earlier, if you think that Dr Spock's approach was wonderful, maybe you need to look at what happened in his own family.