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-   -   Girlfriend having doubts (https://www.askmehelpdesk.com/showthread.php?t=292130)

  • Dec 14, 2008, 05:17 PM
    gra6
    Girlfriend having doubts
    I have been going out with my girlfriend for just over a year. For the past three and a half months she has been living on the other side of the world. In a few weeks I am going to join her and she has recently found an amazing house for us to live in. She has been having a fantastic time while she has been away and tells me that she is really glad that I am coming out and that it will be a lot of fun.

    Over the past few weeks she has been slightly more distant than normal and although we speak most nights does not seem as set on the relationship as she has been in the past. I recently discussed this with her and she told me that she didn't feel that there was need for concern. She said that she has just got used to me not being there and on further questioning that she is not 100% convinced about the future but wants to give things a good go and see how things turn out.

    I feel a bit saddened as our relationship had been great and we were making plans for the future. Should I be concerned, or is this just normal when you have been apart for some time?
  • Dec 14, 2008, 06:34 PM
    neverme

    You've been apart for a good while. She is just getting pre-seeing-you jitters.

    Go see her in top form and show her why she has nothing to worry about, you are great and you have a great relationship. This all depends on the half-full / half-empty way of looking at things.

    Try to see it as an opportunity to get to know her all over again and have fun in your relationship.

    Best of luck.
  • Dec 14, 2008, 07:10 PM
    TrueFaith

    Look she did not say no go away did she.

    She is just scared.. of seeing you again. And if everything will workout

    I bet you are feeling the same way..

    Don't worrie my friend.

    Go there with her. And give it a great shot! And see how things go
    Remember in life we are never stuck!

    If it makes you feel any better I am in a Long distance relationship. Its been 6 months
    And I am seeing her soon as well.
    And I am feeling like. AHH!

    Because I don't know how we will be.

    But then again. Who does.

    All we can do is hope for the best try our best
    And not over thinks too much

    All the best
  • Dec 14, 2008, 07:17 PM
    21boat

    LThese are big steps for her. She is making big thoughts and descions for her and the relationship. She might probably grew a person more while away and that independence is kicking in. sit down and talk nicely. But Don't keep bugging her about it. There's a big that I 've learned Women may ask a question but don't really want an answer yet. And when us men as a queation she many times can't give an answer simply because she does't know yet what the answer is, WE all don't like to answer a question we not sure of yet and Ergo Nagging kicks in of the other frustration on now answer or one we don't want to hear or agree with. So hang tight sit down and make an actual time to talk about your and her feelings on the subject You can't make someone love you and you can't fix a person. Is a persons personal choice no matter what.
  • Dec 15, 2008, 09:03 AM
    talaniman

    Stop being so negative, and insecure, as you will see for yourself in a bit, so be patient until you are together again.

    I know the distance is hard, but deal with it a little longer, and a lot more positively. For no reason, project your insecurities or fears to her.

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