My GF and I have been dating for about a year and a half, we are both only 19 and have been living together for 3 months. I don't really use MySpace, but I went on and saw comments on her photos saying that I'm ugly, "I see why you run the relationship," etc. Her sister told me that she was going around myspace telling people she runs the relationship. Why does she do that, even if she feels she does, why do you feel the need to talk Sh*t about me to other people. So I wanted to see exactly what she is telling people, I realize snooping is wrong, but then again she has done it to me, and I am glad I did. First I saw messages with one guy. It was after we got in a fight, she was saying how I'm a piece of sh*t boyfriend and she's moving out (she didn't). They were making plans to hang out, she asked if he was trying to hook up with her and he said I don't know I'm just trying to see what happens. My GF said, "thats chill heres my number, but wont kyle get mad." They could have hooked up don't really know... Now Kyle is her Ex; she said she thought she loved him but when we got together she said she realized it was never love. So I look at his profile and she left comment, "heyy, this my cell **** I'll be in town for Christmas. It me up if you wanna catch up or something. Hope to hear from you soon..." Besides that there are other messages, where she told friends kyle is her first love so she doesn't know what to do. Obviously she still has love for him. She may have already cheated me with the other guy, and might at Christmas with her Ex. How do I confront her? What is appropriate?

Extreme situations call for extreme measures. She has and is royally insulting you and your intelligence.

There are many ways to deal with this situation, one more hurtful to her than the other. But the conclusion is always the same, you have to keep your dignity and get rid of her before she makes the move on you.

Personally I would put her in a box by the door and wish her a happy life.

Well from what I read. This is not a nice sign.

So ill tell you a bit about me :)

My head runs away with myself many many times. I see things that are not there. And I always think the worst..

it is a very annoying issue that I am working on.. but. The fact of the matter is. She did give her number to her x. that is something you can not take

and if she is going round telling people she runs the relationship and you are shuch a sh@t boyfriend..

My advice

Confront her. Tell her. That people are saying. That you run this relationship and that you say I'm a Sh@t boyfriend.

Now if you feel this way? What are you doing with me.

I would talk with her. And get her side of the story first. But honestly I would not take one more second of this. And I would put my foot down

I hope it works out for you

Catching her out guard is the best thing to do because she will never see it coming. Don't let her dodge from answering any questions. She got catch out there and I'd love to hear what she has to say but remember what you read because that tells a lot. She has a lot of nerves.

Now wonder people get caught cheating!

Posting on myspace! Some people's kids!

You seem like a really nice guy. You deserve an honest and caring partner.

Disappear from her life.

Honestly, I would disappear from her. Just go AWOL. No returning phone calls, no text messages. Live your life and get someone who likes you.

I appreciate all the replies. Thank You. This is my first long term relationship, I really rushed into things, and perhaps that was a big mistake. You live and you learn I guess. The problem is that I love her, which makes everything harder. We fight all the time now, things just got bad when we moved together. Sometimes she still asks me when we are going to get engaged, because we both thought we wanted to, young and love. I don't know how she can honestly ask me that. I feel like the relationship has been at its end for a while, but neither of us can pull the trigger. I don't understand how she can ask me when she will get a ring, she has to sense the relationship is falling apart too.

I just moved out from my parents house a few months a go and she came with me. I have no one here, fear of loneliness is definitely a concern. I know that I will deal with it and everyone does but its just such a bad time in my life to deal with it. My father died a year a go, I'm still dealing with that. I just moved across the state to go to college, and since I live off campus with my girlfriend, I have zero friends here.

It's not that easy to just get rid of her, besides the emotions, she lives here, and I would have to help facilitate that transition.

Sounds like it's time to call it quits with her.

As far as her making unkind remarks about your appearance, I recall you said you were only 19. At the bottom of my post there's a signature line with a quote. Form Lilli Tomlin. Here's another one of her sayings I always liked, "Youth is its own definition of beauty." There's an awful lot of truth to that so just keep it in mind next time she slams you on myspace.

Getting rid of someone is never easy
And there is really no good time to do it.

Just think about this.
You will unhappy with her. And alone then she will cheat on you. Then probable move out of the house

So whatever happens. You will be alone.

So my advice is. To first look for another place. Try and find an on campus room. I know its hard. And even more so around the holidays trust me.

But what's the point of being in a relationship if she treats you like this?

My view. Its better to be unhappy and alone
Than Unhappy and alone with someone

Don't let the fear of being alone stop you from finding someone that you can truly be with.


All the best

Dump her without warning and let her keep wondering.
For her to be saying telling people she runs the relationship and you are such a sh@t boyfriend...
Means I am on the look for somebody that I will be happier with but until then I am using him. I run the relationship so it doesn't matter what he wants, it doesn't matter if I cheat on him. I do what I want, when I want, how I want.

I know its not going to be easy, and I know you have a lot on your mind, buts its best to be alone, and treat yourself well, than to be with someone who doesn't.

This is something you do for yourself, and just as you found her, you'll find someone better.

You'll never be happy with her, AND YOU OWE HER NOTHING EXCEPT TO TELL HER TO GET THE HELL OUT!