Ask Me Help Desk - Space issue

Me and my girlfirend have been dating for the past five years going 6,she says she wants some space,but this whole situation a believe it started ong ago,I found out that my girl was cheating on me three years ago and I thought I gave fogave her but I was wrong and I think I never found closure for the whole situation,I started by letting her know that I did the same thing with her firend which was true and then after I kept on reminding of the what she she did for years and trying make her feel guilty and where as I was wrong but before she fell pregnant and we were still in tertiary and I told her that it would ruin my life but I told her that at the end of the day it is her choice but I knew I was not going to complete school and we were both young at the time,but now I used to have mistrust issues with her and it started all over again where I was pushed to a pint where I was angry and I slapt her because I found a draft that was saying last night was magic and she told me that it was her neighbour firend that was using her which is why she did not delete and that made me angry and it reminded me of how I felt before then I apologised and was ambarrased because I nverver did that before and was surprised that it happened and we both love each other.the next time a found her sitting with a colleague that we both work with and the claimed that he came to drop off something and the mother comfirmed it but I threw a fit,thatsa when she started the space thing

Quote:

Originally Posted by matlaisr

me and my girlfirend have been dating for the past five years going 6,she says she wants some space,but this whole situation a believe it started ong ago,i found out that my girl was cheating on me three years ago and i thought i gave fogave her but i was wrong and i think i never found closure for the whole situation,i started by letting her know that i did the same thing with her firend which was true and then after i kept on reminding of the what she she did for years and trying make her feel guilty

Does this sound like a recipe for a healthy relationship? I think not. You guys have a pretty poor foundation right now and it is crumbling. I have to think that the two of you cannot be together right now. I just don't see it happening. You both cheated on each other, and it is eating at both of you from the inside out. Not sure if something like this can be fixed. If she wants space, you give it to her, but I surely wouldn't expect this relationship to piece itself back together. If you ask me, cut the losses and both of you start a new healthy relationship with someone else. You both need a lot of time away from each other, for sure.

It won't be long until you both have had enough of the drama, and games, and leave each other alone. That's what needs to happen as the trust is gone and the bad behavior has poisoned whatever it is you had.

You both need some help to learn to do better. Neither of your actions shows love or will bring about a sharing and caring healthy relationship.