In Massachusetts, My brother's exwife has a restraining order on him saying he cannot have any contact 0r be within 100 yards of her or their 3 children. It was an ugly divorce and a lot of money was involved. Needless to say she got everytning, and has since remarried. They both seem to find joy in making my brother's life miserable.

I have had a relationship with the children before, during and after the divorce. The oldest chid is a girl and she is 15. We spoke on the phone often. The second child is also a girl and is 12, the yougest a boy 7. I was told that if I had contact with the children that it would be considered violating the restraining order and my brother would be arrested. Is this true? If so, then this will be the first Christmas since the birth of the children, that I will not be sending them Christmas and birthday presents.

The Children have no famiy as my ex-sister in law has no contact with her mother,father and sisters. My brother and I have a large loving family and we want to be in the children's lives. Is there anything I can do? I heard from the oldest a few months ago that her mother and her step father picked her up from work while they were intoxicated. The have no one to talk to as I know they fear their mother as she has a violent temper and drinks too much(I have seen this with my own eyes).

Any advice would be much appreciated!

LB in Tennessee

I would doubt that the restraining order specifies that you are not allowed to make contact or that it could lead to your brother's arrest - but check with your brother about that. He has a copy of the restraining order, doesn't he? Read it.

As the aunt I don't believe you have any legal right that would force the mother to grant you access to the children. You might want to consider sending Christmas gifts, but obviously not if the mother is going to just toss them away. It sounds like an ugly situation, but perhaps you could call the ex and ask whether she would be willing for the kids to accept a Christmas gift from you? Arde you on speaking terms?

To be blunt - the fact that your brother has a restraining order against him that precludes him having contact with his own children will pretty much make it impossible for the kids to have any personal contact with anyone else in his family. My suggestion is for your brother to work with his attorney to try to get the terms of the restraning order modified.