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-   -   Washington State Adoption: There is no father listed on birth certificate (https://www.askmehelpdesk.com/showthread.php?t=289289)

  • Dec 7, 2008, 02:27 AM
    ilovekarma
    Washington State Adoption: There is no father listed on birth certificate
    OK... so in the last month of our relationship I got pregnant. Didn't know until a month after that. Took the respectful route and told him before anyone else. He gave me every excuse to get rid of the baby. "i would be a terrible father" "you don't want to have kids with me" "i should go back to iraq and let them finish the job" (he was hurt from bomb and was discharged) then he got controlling. "you can' t do this by yourself!" yes I can "when we get married" ummm no you cheated... "well this is gonna happen if you want me there!" nope sorry don't want to forfeit a possible happy life "i don't want to be a weekend dad. its all or nothing!"

    Well the baby showed up... a mutual friend called him 10 minutes after and he said to our friend "if you ever mention the baby again I will end you!" (ya I picked a winner... ) so he never came down to sign the birth certificate. I haven't changed my number. I kept him up to date with all of the dr visits while pregnant, going against legal advice due to his controlling manner.

    Currently it says mother: my name and father: un-named. I have a wonderful husband now and he IS my baby's father. He is amazing and wants to adopt my child!

    OK question... Do I still need to go through the whole terminating of parental rights thing?

    He isn't on the because and I have never gone after him for cs. He has never called for our child but has called to harass me about us being together. (never once mentioning wanting to be a family with our child)

    My husband is a wonderful father and comes from a family who has adopted step children but doesn't know the answer to this one. If I can skip a VERY awkward and anxiety filled face to face conversation with this person that would be FANTASTIC!
  • Dec 7, 2008, 12:14 PM
    Synnen

    Sorry---he STILL has rights, and you STILL have to get them terminated.

    I HIGHLY suggest doing it through a lawyer. If he refuses out of spite, go after him for as much child support as possible, and get it retroactive.

    When he has the choice between child support and terminating rights, my guess is that he'll sign over his rights.

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