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-   -   Girlfriend told me she only loves me as a friend and walked out (https://www.askmehelpdesk.com/showthread.php?t=287451)

  • Dec 2, 2008, 11:15 AM
    matthew1210
    Girlfriend told me she only loves me as a friend and walked out
    Hi all,

    My Girlfriend and I have been together for seven years and bought a house last year. She told me last month that she only loves me as a friend and walk out on me last week. I tried everything, told her how much I love her and care for her. We hardly every had a bad patch in our relationship and was going to get married next year. Im feeling so down and lost and don't now what to do, I love her so much she means the world to me, can anyone who's been through this point me in the right way because I don't know what to do Im so upset.:(
  • Dec 2, 2008, 11:47 AM
    matthew1210

    Anyone, I'm feeling really down and could do with some help..
  • Dec 2, 2008, 11:57 AM
    TrueFaith

    Sadly there is not much you can do.

    If she has made up her mind. Then all you have to do is let her go

    It is easy said than done even more so after 7 years.
    I would sort the house out first. Because there is nothing more messy than buying stuff together.

    As for yourself.
    Go to no contact
    And start the healing.
    Also find a hobby to get your mind off her.

    There is no winning someone back. And you should never have false hope bcuase that will just lead you down the wrong road.

    Read the stickes up on this form they will help you a lot

    10000 of people like you have gon threw this
    So you are not alone.

    And what you are feeling now is normal. Of course your going to feel down.

    Try not to let it effect your work or personal life

    And be strong
  • Dec 2, 2008, 12:06 PM
    talaniman

    I know how bad it hurts, but I strongly suggest you handle your business, and resolve the finances, and the house, before you start crying over your loss.
  • Dec 2, 2008, 12:14 PM
    uvware
    I know that you are trying to search for a reason... an answer as to why she did this, but most likely you will not ever know.

    For whatever reason... midlife crisis, another person, financial stress, depression, etc. the bottom line is that you can't make her come back.

    I agree with the previous answer, you need to focus in your life right now. Being depressed and letting it effect you, your life and your job is not going to help. Be strong, lean on friends, keep yourself busy, find a church, pick up a hobby, go on a trip, and just accept what has happened.

    The sooner you move on, the sooner you can get out there, date again and find the woman that is right for you.

    I'm sorry I couln't help more... be strong.
  • Dec 2, 2008, 09:08 PM
    slapshot_oi

    I guess we can't speak for her, but why, after seven years, would someone say that? Is it an attraction thing?
  • Dec 2, 2008, 09:46 PM
    wolfgangqpublic
    Quote:

    Originally Posted by slapshot_oi View Post
    I guess we can't speak for her, but why, after seven years, would someone say that? Is it an attraction thing?

    I'm almost certain that this couple started their relationship at a fairly young age, and they simply grew apart, and she resents feeling that she missed out on all the "fun" of the years past by being in a relationship. Truth is, she probably didn't miss out on much but stupidity and pointless mistakes, but you only learn from them if you make them. She's longing for what she never had, and the idea of permanency drove her away.

    But on the other hand, there is no question that there were other issues in the relationship. You're just still too close to the situation to see them all yet.
  • Dec 2, 2008, 11:49 PM
    blondndisguise5

    Marriage and commitment are scary things. Maybe she got scared, maybe she has been thinking A lot about it. The best things you can do is keep yourself busy and do not let this ruin your life. Work hard to be successful and figure out what you need to do with your house and such. Instead of going nc go limited contact. You know this might be something with age, where you guys are at.
  • Dec 3, 2008, 12:20 AM
    hjpan


    Get rid of everything she gave to you.
    Burn all letters, notes, pictures etc. of you and her together.
    Delete her number, email, and everything between you 2.
    When economy comes back, sell the house and move out of the city/country.

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