7 years ago I was in a relationship with a girl, a year into that relationship she claims we had non-consensual sex. It is entirely possible we had sex, but I do not ever recall her ever saying "stop" or "dont do this" or anything like that - I deplore rape and if ide have heard that I would have stopped. We had both been drinking and her parents were in next room. We went out for a year/18 months after the event, and since then I am married (2 years) with a small baby on the way.

The only slight bit of evidence there is is an email I sent saying "sorry if i hurt you dont know what i was thikning" about a week after the event, but I'm sure that was about an argument we had.
I was arrested and released and I'm waiting on the cps to decide if there's a case. Do you think this will go to court? I'm so scared that the court will believe her and its totally false. This could ruin everything in my life and I could loose everything.

Please advise.

What! Is there a statute (sp?) of limmitations here. Get a lawyer. Very difficult to prove!

Its not been decided whether its going to court yet. I will hear in a couple of months. From everything I read there is no time limit. But seeing as we were in a (then loving) relationship for a year prior and subsequent I just wonder where this has come from. I'm scared

This sounds like scare tactics from the boy's in blue.

If they scare you into 'confessing' or to 'copping a plea for a lesser sentence'

Look at it from outside of the box.

IF they had enough,you wouldn't be on the outside,you would be in visiting 'bubba' and being his bestest boy!

If they can make you sweat enough(like you are doing right now)you might crack,this is a VERY old ploy,don't fall prey to it,IF YOU DIDN'T DO ANYTHING,DON'T INVENT IT.AND DON'T SAY YOU DID ANYTHING!

I guess you could use this as advise to others about drinking and sex. Whether it was rape or not is really he said/she said unless there is physical evidence of the act.

I would like to know why she waited all this time to come forward about a "rape" and if she claims you raped her "why did she stay with you for 18 months after this incident supposely happened ?"

Have she contacted you lately about something, i.e. getting back together?

Her story sounds a little fishy to me.

Little fishy? It's the port of grimsby!

I feel a bit better now , but if there's any lawyers here ide like to know a bit more about the email and how admissible that is in evidence.

I agree, why did she wait?? You do need an attorney asap. You can check the "experts" below.

Hello dk:

Well, I ain't no lawyer - but I know the law.

The email is admissible, but what does it admit to? Certainly NOT a criminal act, so I wouldn't worry about that.

What I'd worry MORE about is what you told them when they arrested you.

What I WOULD do in any case, is hire the best criminal defense attorney you can afford. THEN maybe, I would relax. But without any defense, I'd be shaking in my boots.

excon

I really doubt that this will be prosecuted. All your defense attorney has to do is her why she continued to date you after the alleged rape. I can't see a jury convicting with those circumstances. So no prosecutor is going to want to take it on.

Frist of all I have to say that I really dislike women\girls who claim rape when it wasn't. It really puts the people who have been raped in a very bad situation.

I do think it sounds fishy that she dated you for so long she had felt that you raped her.

You should really get a lawyer right away.

I was subjected to rape this summer and I haven't gone to the police b\c I know I have no evidence. And she has non either. It sounds as if it really is word against word. If you didn't do it then you have hopefully nothing to worry about, but I understand that you're scared!

Get a lawyer and do not talk to the police again without a lawyer. Not that all cops are bad, but some have been known to use bad tactics when it comes to getting confessions. (I'm not a lawyer either, but I have a BA in criminoloigy and we have talked about that subject of cohesions, police and tactics.)

Once again: get a lawyer, or at least consult one, b\c they can tell you were you stand.

PS: it does sound like she has a poor case, the email doesn't prove anything, she was with you for a long time both before and after.

Sounds like she has some serious issues!

I think you should repost this question in a law forum.

Quote:

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Originally Posted by danielnoahsmommy

what! is there a statute (sp?) of limmitations here. get a lawyer. very difficult to prove!

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The Statute of limitation for rape was changed in NY State some years ago (I think 2006) from five years to no statute at all. It's open ended.