Well I'm seventeen and at first I look like an average kid, but inside I know there is something wrong. I go on each day and I'm not happy as I used to be. I feel as though I have entered a depression and I figure it has something to do with me feeling lonely. All my friends have a certain someone that they can spend time with and I guess that must be getting to me. I recently liked someone but that person actually turned out to be using me and I went through a sudden realization that maybe I won't ever meet anyone for me. I really don't know what to do, I have also started smoking and have no idea why. I recently went a week of driving around in my car in hopes that I could get into a car accident. I know that I would never due anything that drastic and was wondering if there was anything you great people could tell me to help me become more motivated and less lonely and depressed. Also the girl that used me is all I think about and I don't know how to get her off my mind, it drives me crazy.

I could only imagine the sense of loneliness that you feel driving around in your car alone finding something to do on a Friday night. You should be parting with your friends or hooking up on a date right? Well girls come and go; some are good and others well... you know. You sound like a really sweet guy and I am sorry you got used. Not all of us are like that and there is someone out there for you. You are seventeen so you have plenty of time to date and play the single game (which I personally know can be a disaster sometimes) but think of every encounter as an experience.

WHY WOULD YOU START SMOKING?? That's stupid, I smoked at 14 and still have a hard time with it... STOP. Ok, so you need something to fill up your time (this is why your smoking and why she is still on your mind). How about joining a sport? Going to the gym? Hobby? What do you like to do?

Hi, Nelson12!

I agree with xoxaprilwine on the points made above, especially about, what do you like to do?

Are you into any of the arts of any kind, such as writing, painting, theater, music, etc. If so, in what way are you into them, please?

Thanks!

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Originally Posted by Nelson12

Well I'm seventeen and at first I look like an average kid, but inside I know there is something wrong. I go on each day and I'm not happy as I used to be. I feel as though I have entered a depression and I figure it has something to do with me feeling lonely. All my friends have a certain someone that they can spend time with and I guess that must be getting to me. I recently liked someone but that person actually turned out to be using me and I went through a sudden realization that maybe I won't ever meet anyone for me. I really don't know what to do, I have also started smoking and have no idea why. I recently went a week of driving around in my car in hopes that I could get into a car accident. I know that I would never due anything that drastic and was wondering if there was anything you great people could tell me to help me become more motivated and less lonely and depressed. Also the girl that used me is all I think about and I don't know how to get her off my mind, it drives me crazy.

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Here is your answer.. MUSIC!(rock/metal).. suite yourself...

I run cross country, and ever since the season ended I became like even more depressed.

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Originally Posted by Nelson12

I run cross country, and ever since the season ended I became like even more depressed.

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The season ended, but you didn't... Why don't you continue to train during the off season?

Well the only thing stopping me right now would be winter but its not like I haven't ran through snow before.

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Originally Posted by Nelson12

Well the only thing stopping me right now would be winter but its not like i haven't ran through snow before.

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Good good, GREAT start!!

Can you train in a gym? Is that a possibility? Think of how much stronger you would be next season if you trained all winter!

Yeah I would be so much better next season if I did that but there isn't going to be another season, I am off to college next year..

And you can't get on the team at college?

I don't know where you live, but we have TONS of cross country teams where I live that are not affiliated with any schools and are always looking for strong runners.

Ever looked into the junior olympics? My daughter's 18 year old friend just got on the team. And because of it, and her training all year long, she is looking at a full ride scholarship her sophomore year in college.

I run cross country at a Division-III college, so that is always an option. If you love running it's really hard to quit, that's why I decided to continue on. It's a great way to relieve stress and it makes you feel great about yourself for making it through those really intense workouts. Maybe you could look into the cross country programs at the colleges you're looking into. Or you could just continue to run on your own as a form of relaxation.

I just ran for a school fundraiser around our school track for an hour, and I ran 6 miles. Things are starting to look up.

One thing I came to understand when I was a teen and depressed is I philosophized on it and these are the things I rationalized.

A. There is external depression and internal depression meaning you are letting circumstances dictate your mood. Internal depression is more what they now call clinical depression and it can be a chemical imbalance and you can't put your finger on what is making you feel this way.
I would guess your depression is external and you need to build up your interests and work toward goals. It's all about self improvement and self image. Elton John, talk show host Mike Savage and others even say that some depression is good if it motivates you to be active and creative. You need to learn how to overcome it rather than letting it overwhelm you. If your depression is external then you are looking to things to make you happy instead of looking within and creating yourself image that you are comfortable with,
Many creative writers and artists were depressed and if they had went and got on meds to make them feel better then we may not have had some of their great works today.
Of course if your depression is internal/clinical then you will need to go get the counseling and meds but in the meantime see if you can overcome it by creating a YOU that you enjoy.

Also you might want to check out Seasonal Affective Disorder and see if that might be a piece of your depression. I know it is a large part of the depression I still get but other than freezing I am learning to not let it get the better of me.

Dude again I will say... music is the answer...

Thank you for all your guy's help. I just wanted to let you know I am somewhat out of this depression I'm in because for the past couple of months I have still been very depressed. Because on December 14 one of my close friends died in a car accident. And I almost lost like 4 other of my best friends in that car crash as well. I just wanted to let you guys know thank you for your advice.

I'm sorry to learn of the loss of your friend, Nelson12!