My boyfriend and I known each other since I was 6 and he was 8 almost 9

Now he is 19 and I am 17
We have been going out on and off for a while but I love him and the reasons for the break ups were stupid
We have now been together for a month and it took us half a year to get together( we broke up in march got back together last month) and we talk about sex and I have openly told him that I want to have sex but I don't know if I should wait longer or if the years we have known each other is enough for me to make this step

I think you should wait until your married. That should be a gift you give to your husband.

Hindsight is 20/20. I must agree with
H0llister. I threw mine away for nothing. I'll regret that forever.
P.S. I would never date a guy I had already broken up with. That ship has sailed.

What do you expect to get out of having sex with him??

It's easy. If you answer yes to all of the questions I'm about to ask, then you're ready.

1. Are you financially capable to raise a child?

2. Are you emotionally ready to have a child?

3. Are you physically ready to have a child?

4. Are you willing to raise a child as a single parent?

5. Do you have a job?

6. Are you done school?

7. If you get an STD can you afford health care?

8. Are you on birth control?

9. Do you know that no form of birth control is 100% effective, even if you double or triple up?

If you answered yes to all of the above, then you're ready, so go for it!

Good luck.

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Originally Posted by bsd_tector

P.S. I would never date a guy I had already broken up with. That ship has sailed.

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I completely agree with the above note and if your not sure; your not ready.

I would also like to say that he is now an adult. You are still a minor! Both of you could possibly get in trouble legally! The likelihood of you staying together for a long period at your age is next to none. Do you really want to possibly risk your whole future just to have sex? I would do as the others have said, and wait. You've got plenty of time!

You're hesitating because you're unsure of the consequences, which is a good instinct for someone your age.

Do you feel that having sex with him is your "next step"? I think that many young people feel that since you've been dating for awhile and have known each other for years that sex makes sense.

I can only tell you my opinion is from my own experience. I had sex when I was 15 with a boy that I had been dating for 3 years. I had known him for a long time and we had been there and done that in terms of making out and getting to know each other bodies. So it made sense.
That was a mistake. Not because it was horrible. The main reason was regret, you only get to choose this once... you can't go back to being a virgin after this. So it's a big deciison.
When you choose to have sex, the first person you do it with, that you are in love with, there is a bond, and emotional deep tie. Which in itselfs seems great, right? But if he hasn't committed to you in terms of marriage, being your husband, your partner in life, then this beautiful thing that you shared and have given him could be in vain. Especially since he's broken up with you. You need to also ask yourself if you are doing this to "keep" him because that logic never works.

Save it for your husband. It's such a beautiful thing to share with the man you KNOW will be in your future. I also thinks if he loves you he would wholly commit to you before he asks you to commit to him.

You are 17 and have so much more to experience not only in life but in relationships both friendships and relationships.

Make him wait - preferably until marriage. That is a sure way to tell whether the guy really loves and respects you or not.

If you are asking that question here you are not ready.

He'll love you even more if you don't have sex with him. Trust me.

It doesn't sound as if you're ready, what are your reasons for wanting to sleep with him? To keep him for a little longer this time?

Personally I waited until I was emotionally ready to have sex and there is not shame in waiting. Besides the first time is special mostly because its your first time and why through it away on your on again\of again boyfriend?

I agree with Altenweg's agree. If he really loves you he'll wait.

It's good that you are asking if you should wait. You really should. There are legal issues, raising a child if you get pregnant, etc... When you are ready you will know. I won't say wait until you are married because I didn't. But at least wait until you know what you would do about birth control, if there was a child, etc... Talk to your boyfriend about those things and if he blows it off or changes the subject, definitely don't have sex with him. I know you have known him a while, but breaking up, even for stupid reasons, still means something. If they were stupid reasons, why break up? Communication is key in any relationship and it seems like you need to work on that if you keep breaking up.

I agree with the response from daniel.. if you have to sit and ask yourslef that question and wonder then you are not ready

Wow thanks and he has resently told me that he wants us to wait so I don't have to worry

Well if he said that, then no need to wait now :p
Have a happy new year ;)

Think expecting people to wait these days is unrealistic and dated. I do think though that the fact that you had to ask means your not ready. What's the rush? The world or your relationship will not suddenly change after you've slept with him, also sex can but strain on a new relationship.

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Originally Posted by kimsland

Well if he said that, then no need to wait now :p
Have a happy new year ;)

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What kind of childish game is that? :rolleyes: