I really don't know where to start... first off, I am 17 years old, and dated an amazing girl since last September. Everything was great. First, she told me she wanted a break. For no reason, all she said is we fought too much. And she wanted to let loose with other guys. My friends tell me she isn't worth it, but I always thought she was the one. Yeah I'm young, but I feel like I could never feel like this with anyone else ever, soooo many memories. We pretty much planned our whole life together. We "thought" we were so in love. I still feel like I am. Just a little bit on her, this is the girl I've been totally drooling over for 4 years now. Everything was going great I thought, I treated her like royalty. But at times she was very mean and cruel to me. She got mad about the smallest things.

Now this past weekend, 3 days after she dumps me, she hooks up with 2 guys in 2 days, and now thinks she has a lot of feelings for this guy. She told me I'm never allowed to talk to her again. But a week ago she told me maybe we could date in a couple months. Now she never wants to talk to me again. Just because of our past I feel like maybe we could get back together in a few years. She already has moved on after 3 days. I just can't get her out of my head, everything I do reminds me of her. She really makes no sense. But I am so lost, and really don't want to move on, some girls are so shallow, and I really don't see anyone right now who could replace her. I just need some help on how to move on for this specific situation, and hopefully move on without her. I just can't help but think about all of our amazing times together, and can never think of the bad ones. Believe me there was a lot of bad times. But we had so many magical times together, she was definitely my first love, and I wanted her to be the one. I still think she is. Do you think she will realize I am the one for her and come running back? Or is it over?

Also, I forgot to post this, she said she has absolutely no feelings for me anymore, which is hard to hear, but is really hard to believe because she has said things she didn't mean in the past..

You spend so much time planning a lifetime that you fail to remember how hard it is to just get through a week with someone.

How you feel about her is almost beside the point here. She's sleazing out and your feelings about it mean nothing to her. Don't you see that?

So, she occasionally deems to offer you a carrot that MAYBE you two can date some more later when she's done sleazing out with whomever she wants. This is a good thing in your mind? I certainly hope not.

Wouldn't it be awesome to be going out with someone who is totally into you... right now? Not just a little in the past, but ACTUALLY into you today? Wouldn't that be better?

Pining after sleaze-girl feels romantic, but think about what you get if she changes her mind and comes back to you... you know what you get? You get sleaze girl! How is that a good thing?

It really is OK if you police yourself in these matters. When your heart is screaming "but I want her, I want her" and everything your mind and life know about the truth is that she's no good for you anymore, in that situation you have to overrule your heart. It wants what it wants and doesn't care if it screws up your life or your mind.

So you have to be stronger than that. You can do it.

Ok so let me get this right

She dumps you seconds after goes out with 2 other guys. Yes?

Bloody hell mate. What the hell are you doing even thinking about this women

She does not care for you AT ALL!
She does not want to be with you. AT ALL.
She is going out with different guys.

and you still want her back? shall i just call you FIDO the DOG? or what


Grow a pair right. Leave this chick in the dust. OK. And get on with your life. Because all your friends are right!
I know its hard to hear the truth.. but her actions have shown you.. what she really thinks about you.

Which is not a lot

She has shown you no respect.
And you have shown yourself no respect
But
A--- Putting up with it! (because you think you won't feel these feelings against? Wrong!)

B-- For wanting a girl back. That treats you with no respect care or love.

You said you had many good times?

Yeah well. All them times got deleted the second she dumped you and told you never to call her again and started dating other guys.


Memories a stranger

Don't let the feelings fool you.

Hey buddy I'm going through the same thing right now and the best thing you can do is get on with your life

Obviously I need to move on, its simple, the girl wants to be a whore right right now, but what if she comes around and realizes she made a bad decision. And if I'm not right and she never comes back, how do I get these feelings out and memories and thoughts out of my head?

You probably won't get feelings and memories of her out of your head ever but 1 thing is for sure you will get stronger feelings for someone else and better memories

By the way I'm 17 2 I know exactly how you feel

And to the other posts, I wouldn't say seconds after but it was 3 days after. I think its disrespectful to do that to a guy who treated you so well. I just can't stand picturing my first love with another guy. She said I cared too much about her, and she felt like I was trying to hard.. I just don't get women

I don't think us guys ever will they must think just because we are guys we don't have feelings you no

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Originally Posted by smurf69

i dont think us guys ever will they must think just because we are guys we dont have feelings u no

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To be honest, I have heard many women surprised to learn, through various incidents and conversations, that men are hurt by these types of things. They've been conditioned to believe a certain thing about the male psyche that isn't necessarily accurate, just as we have about them. If you talk about it with your buddies, they'll almost always give a nodding sign of understanding.

Seconds... or 3 days?

Oh sod off with that will you.

Really man don't you dare try to defend her.

And real smart man. You want her to go off and be a whore.. and then if she comes back crying.. because of all the guys she tried.

Your willing to take her back?

Grow an Fing! Back bone! And leave this chick the Hell ALONE! For your own good you
Muppet! Please please!


Yeah well first loves move on man. Mine did. So did many others.
We don't think about them with other guys. Because they are not our problem anymore.

We think about ourselves! And what we learnt from the relationship!
And how better off we will be when the next girl comes around.


3 days... Ha! That makes it all better.
Stop lying to yourself.
And move on man

I think there are good women out there, some like the one I was with maybe was a little self centered? I don't know if that's the word. But its like she only cares about her feelings and her life and could care less about the guy who she called her everything and all that crap. I ripped up everything she gave me, including a scrapbook she made for me which was very, very difficult.

You got it right man Self Centered..

and as I said. She does not care about you.

Wait till you meet a women that reall cares about you man :)

then you will understand why I'm pisst that you want a person like this back in your life =)


Your doing great DELET everything!
and block her from your life

This time is all about YOU. You. You .YOU

Work on yourself
do things to make yourself happy

trust me. You will be so much better off without her in your life

not to sound corny here
but it's a start Down a new road for you!

Don't make the same mistakes and just enjoy the ride! :P yeah it's a B@@H when you get a falt! But keep on moven!

Regards

I feel like I'm doing pretty good, I just can't stop thinking of the girl.. everything I do reminds me of her. It sucks. There were so many bad memories but right now I just can't help but think of the good ones. Which was a lot less then the bad ones.

It's like getting a song stuck in your head, the more you try to NOT think of the song, the more it plays...

This is the same thing. You'll take some time to get her tune out of your head. Take it easy, don't beat yourself up for thinking of her, but also don't put any feet to any of those thoughts. Let them come, then let them go.

Not worth it.

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Originally Posted by husky04

i feel like im doing pretty good, i just can't stop thinking of the girl.. everything i do reminds me of her. it sucks. there were so many bad memories but right now i just can't help but think of the good ones. which was alot less then the bad ones.

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Look good or bad memories will always stick around. I'm sure you can still picture vividly good times you had as a kid and bad. What matters is how you react. You embrace those and know they were good. Instead of thinking of the memories in a bad think to the day that you can enjoy that again with another woman. Look back and once the dust has settled you'll realize it probably wasn't a good relationship. And if you don't than you will go through all this for nothing.

She has now moved on to another guy, after hooking up with him the first time they spent time together, now they have feelings for each other and are probably going to date. Her friends are telling me she is so happy with him and he tells her she is amazing and all that. I don't know what I did wrong, I wrote 14 poems for this girl and gave them all to her. They were really good poems too. I told her I loved her everyday and reminded her that she was the most perfect girl out there. But I didn't say it too much to overwhealm her. I really thought I wasn't doing anything wrong. She got mad about the smallest things and blew them up. Now she is saying she doesn't care about my feelings at all and does not even love me anymore? After a week. Is that even remotely possible?

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Originally Posted by husky04

she has now moved on to another guy, after hooking up with him the first time they spent time together, now they have feelings for each other and are probably going to date. her friends are telling me she is so happy with him and he tells her she is amazing and all that. i dont know what i did wrong, i wrote 14 poems for this girl and gave them all to her. they were really good poems too. i told her i loved her everyday and reminded her that she was the most perfect girl out there. but i didnt say it too much to overwhealm her. i really thought i wasnt doing anything wrong. she got mad about the smallest things and blew them up. now she is saying she doesnt care about my feelings at all and does not even love me anymore? after a week. is that even remotely possible?

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You didn't do anything wrong is that aspect. People change and with that change comes new things. Accept it and do not dwell on what she is doing. As far as her she definitely doesn't know what she wants so let to attempt to figure it out. You knew what you wanted. She doesn't offer that so more on.

Do you think there is any chance of her coming back? If so, do I take her back after what she did to me. I'm sure there is no chance of that happening anymore though.