Ask Me Help Desk - How can I beat depression and make friends?

I have recently been diagnosed with depression and I find it really hard to mix with new people I was just wondering if anyone had any advice on how to talk to strangers without them thinking I'm a freak. I feel really out of touch with people I don't really have any friends and I don't know how to make them

Sometimes the easiest way to make friends is to stop looking for them and letting them come to you. A lot of girls are looking for people to hang with they just are too shy or feel something is too wrong with themselves so they don't feel they deserve them. I don't know if there is a key to getting friends but asking questions is a start. Most people in the real world won't think you're a freak when you ask them a logical question. Otherwise spend time around people your age. If you are in the workplace work hard. People will appreciate your work and they will want to get to know you. If you go to school sit near people who interest you. Join in a conversation that you're knowledgeable about or add your input. Some might find this appaling but most don't mind.

Most people are not against you. They are for you, kind of like an audience watching a performer. Most people want the same things, companionship. It's human nature.

Has this been a problem in the past?meeting new people?

Depression and low self esteem are bed mates.

I have been on bi-polar meds for the last 10 years or so,relating to others with this disorder has greatly helped me to recognize the triggers which creep up all the time.

A group setting,with other people suffering with depression, or similar problems, would be a good way to reintroduce yourself back into accepting what you have and who you are.

You are not a social outcast,not less than anyone else.

Depression makes the suferer believe they are just that,outcasts.IT AIN'T TRUE :)

There are millions of people suffering with depression,bi-polar disorder,schizophrenia,and the like, all over the world,most don't know it,or wouldn't do anything about it till something happens to them.(or those around them)

You are now on the other side of the diagnosis,you know what you are suffering from and can do more today than you could ever do in the past.You are no longer bogged down with the unknown.

Meeting new people,doing those things others seemed to have fun doing( but not for you,right?)all those things you can try now.

I could go on and on, but I would like you to write back and let me know what you think,

Ken

I'm sorry to hear that you're suffering from depression! I suffered from depression from the age of 11 until I was 22. And I also had the same problem: making and keeping friends. I was pretty much a loner from the age of 13 until I was 17. Are you in counseling or on medication of any sort?

Personally I got rid of the depression though counseling and the first step was to deal with the depression and to find tools that I could work with. First of all I needed to find out what it was that made me depressend, then I needed to look for good things in myself.

Do you have low self-asteem? I struggled with it.

A very good friend of mine told me lately that its hard to love somebody else or to meet the 'right' type of people if you don't love yourself. i.e. if you don't love yourself first you might end up being friends with people who are mean or who take advantage of you. (I had a friend like that in high school. Who treated me like dirt and I let her because the first two years, she was my only friend.)

I have some ideas that you can think about :)

1. every time you go passed a mirror or a window: you should say one nice thing about yourself... for example: my heair looks really good to day, I have a cute nose, I'm good at math, I'm good at socail-sience etc.

2. do you keep a diary? If you do you might consider starting a self-appreachiating log. Write 2-5 things you like about yourself every day or every other day: for example: I did really good in class today, I made a great dinner, I'm very creative, I have nice eyes etc.

I know all of this can be really hard when you are in a depressive state! When you are sitting in the middle of what seems to be an endless black hole... how to get out of it?

And like sunshineangel said: maybe you should let them find you?

Do you have any special intrests? What did it for me was that I joined an organization, I went to weekly meetings, mingled, helped oraganize events, showed up at the events. :)

Hi, cutesysnowgirl!

You've received some excellent answers above! I too, suffer from clinical depression.

I do have a couple of questions for you though? Are you into doing the fine arts of any kind like music, theater, writing or visual ones, such as painting, drawing, etc.

Depending on how you answer, there may be a way to help you to lift your spirits right on this site!

Thanks!

Quote:

Originally Posted by Clough

Hi, cutesysnowgirl!

You've received some excellent answers above! I too, suffer from clinical depression.

I do have a couple of questions for you though? Are you into doing the fine arts of any kind like music, theater, writing or visual ones, such as painting, drawing, etc.?

Depending on how you answer, there may be a way to help you to lift your spirits right on this site!

Thanks!

Could you tell me about them, thanks.. I would be most gratefull!

Hi, I could do with some friends as most of my friends make me feel down. My life has had a lot of bruises of late whick has made me suffer with this mental illness too. I could really do with knowing about the fine arts on this site. I would be mostly gratefull.. thanks!