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-   -   Adult crush-is he into me? (https://www.askmehelpdesk.com/showthread.php?t=281086)

  • Nov 14, 2008, 10:59 PM
    jervemn
    Adult crush-is he into me?
    I am in my late 20's and am crushing HARD! A group of friends and I go out once a week to a local bar--I met a guy there that absolutely takes the wind out of me. I think he is absolutely amazing and I want to tell him that... but it is easier said than done. Here is why: He is going through some personal issues right now that I won't get into (but it is not woman issues)! He goes to the same place we go to every week and we are getting closer and talking more each time we see each other. I look so forward to seeing him and I am hoping he feels the same. He seems to be flirting with me as well... I am a very confident woman and I sometimes find myself at a loss for words around him. I REALLY want him to ask me out!! He does seem interested, but I feel like he should be interested ENOUGH to ask me out... or for my phone number... something! I feel like it's pretty obvius that I am into him, but I don't want to be the one to ask for a couple of reasons... 1) Because I really do think that if he really is into me, he would/will ask me out (He is very confident and comfortable with himself) 2) Because he is going through some really hard things now that are only going to get harder for awhile and I feel like I am being selfish or something by expecting or wanting him to even really have time to invest right now... What do you think? Should I tell him in plain english that I am crushing, or should I just leave it in his court?

    WOULD GREATLY APPRECIATE SOME MALE PERSPECTIVE AS WELL! THANKS!
  • Nov 14, 2008, 11:18 PM
    Fr_Chuck

    Adults do not live or act like the are in Jr High, you like him, either ask him out or give him your number.
  • Nov 16, 2008, 07:24 PM
    Femur

    Male here. I'm going to give you an example, using myself. I'm VERY confident in myself because of my size and accomplishments. I talk to plenty of females and I have a few I can call my best friends, but I'm horrible at asking people out on dates. We're great at hiding things, and I hide this very well.

    Now for the advice. Does he usually go to this hangout with friends? If so, then here's a great way to tell if he's as interested as you are. Your friends probably already know you're interested in this guy, so ask them to come late, or not come at all. Enter the bar, take a seat and order a drink, sit with no one. Try to make eye contact with him. If he decides to leave his group of friends to come sit with you, then that's a sure indicator that he's interested in you. If there's one thing I hate its seeing my good friends that are girls sitting alone, if he feels the same way, he'll come and sit with you. This is when you make you're move.
  • Nov 16, 2008, 09:24 PM
    xxariesxx
    FR_Chuck is right. There's nothing wrong with being honest about your feelings for him. Just don't necessarily expect anything back and move on if he's not interested.

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