It's heartbreaking enough for me to accept that I will never have him back. But what kills me the most is that I hurt him. I broke up with him because I was mad and sent him mean texts to insult him and put him down. Nobody needs to tell me how wrong it was, or how selfish I am, or that I'm a bad person because I know this. Anyway, I feel absolutely horrible because he text me "you made your bed, now lay in it. those were the meanest things anybody has ever said to me, and this is the last text you will ever get from me." I just want to know if he will get over this, and maybe not hate me one day. I realize I messed up so bad that I will never get him back and I don't deserve him anyway after the way I acted. But I love him and I always will forever and I hate myself for hurting him like that. I'm going to write him an apology letter at least to somehow explain my craziness, and then leave him alone. I wish there was something I could do so he would realize the nasty texts were not true. Is there?

You can apologize, but that doesn't mean he will listen. It will take some time. The good thing is that you realize your mistakes. I am proud of you for not being too hard headed to admit this. In the end, you did make your own bed, and you will have to deal with the consequences, whether they be what you want or not. Only time will tell. He is obviously hurt and I don't think any amount of begging will bring him back. A sincere apology letter may be nice, but stop after that and let him make his mind up... let him heal from the pain.

It would really help us all, if you stuck to one thread, and keep adding on, and not start a new one as you rant, and vent.

Yes, please keep the WHOLE story together so everyone knows what has happened in the past.

As for advice, you can write all the apologies you want, but it's his choice not to read them. I got 3 e-mails from my ex when we broke up "explaining" and "apologizing" and yep, never read a one.

I'm in the same situation right now,so I know exactly what you're talking about.I never wanted to hurt him,but it happened... Can't turn back time. I guess he loved you,but when a boy gets hurt - he changes. The best you could do is wait a few days,until things get better,and then write him the letter,and may be he will at least forgive you.You just have to understand that he got hurt and he needs some time to get over it.I agree with kctiger,it a big plus that you realized your mistakes,but may be you need to show him that,apologize and just wait to see what will happen,but don't send him other letters,if he wants to he will forgive you and call you or something,but don't push him,because this will push him away.