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-   -   I need my girl back (https://www.askmehelpdesk.com/showthread.php?t=278525)

  • Nov 8, 2008, 12:51 PM
    bootzrg
    I need my girl back
    Well basically me and my ex-girlfriend broke up about 6 months ago... and I need her... basically this is what happened... around April I broke up with her and in one day I realized that I needed her and I came back... about 10 days later she broke up with me and I didn't really try to keep her from going... I still had feelings for her but I kept telling her it wasn't meant to be blah blah... my ego was in the way... then we were like "unofficial" till like June... but then I decided that I wanted to get over her completely... so I started talking to another girl... mean while my ex goes to dubai in August and meats a guys goes out with him in the summer and comes back when she came back I wanted to get back with her... but when I heard about the guy I felt like I couldn't go out with her again... and basically tried to go out with that other girl... and well that didn't work out so I told my ex how I felt and she though I was using her as a rebound... and she said she lost all feeling for me and that she just didn't want a boyfriend because she didn't want to be hurt... and now I'm willing to do anything to get back with her... and the funny thing is that were "bestfriends" so we talk everyday... but I think I feel her pulling away... idk... can you help me please... my life's spiraling out of control...
  • Nov 8, 2008, 01:26 PM
    TrueFaith

    Breath your life is not out of control..


    You are just trying to Control how other people feel.

    And that has never been in Your Control
    Your life and your actions are under your control.

    Respect her wishes I know its not what you wanted to hear. But she has moved on and does not want a boyfriend at this time.

    I think you don't know what you want either. As you left her and came back more times than people change there pants in a week.

    Just accept that this is over and move on. With your life try and find something to make you happy.

    And stop trying to control other peoples feelings. Because that will never work.

    Work on your own feelings. And get past this.

    Regards
  • Nov 8, 2008, 01:26 PM
    JBeaucaire

    You're life isn't spiraling out of control. You keep taking whatever your heart declares from moment to moment and trying to make that into your reality. You're chasing your own tail. Your ex has already spotted this behavior in you and pointed it out.

    You WILL have to get ahold of yourself at some point. Your heart, your feelings of the moment, they don't control you. You will be better served by taking that control back sooner rather than later.

    Just because you feel it doesn't mean you need it, nor should get it. If your ex WERE to come back, the melodrama you've lived these past 6 months just would droll on and on and on.

    Ugh.

    Value your new friend. Be her friend. Start working on the other stuff missing in your life, and I don't mean "find a new girlfriend." I mean find some peace in your life without a girlfriend and then when you DO get one again, maybe you won't be so over-the-top about it.
  • Nov 8, 2008, 02:35 PM
    bootzrg

    Thanks guys... I appreciate it... I guess all I can do is be her friend.. but like I can't sleep... eat... do anything... even watch a movie without thinkking about her...
    How do I convince my heart...
  • Nov 8, 2008, 02:57 PM
    JBeaucaire

    You don't. You're heart is an uncontrollable child. I know mine is. That's why you have a mind (to think things through) and a spirit (to gauge how your life is progressing positively).

    Let your heart pout. It will be OK.
  • Nov 8, 2008, 03:26 PM
    TrueFaith

    You can't control that sadly..

    The feelings you are going threw are normal. It happens to us all

    Just keep on doing what you are doing..

    My best advice would not to be friends with her. As your feelings are still strong

    You should go to no contact.
    And then time will do its work

    Good luck
  • Nov 8, 2008, 03:29 PM
    bootzrg
    Thank you very much...
    I guess you guys should know that I'm just 16
    And this advice just helped me more then you guys know
  • Nov 8, 2008, 07:31 PM
    talaniman

    You will be okay, just leave her alone for a while, and do what you were doing before she came along. This is normal to be so in love one minute, and be out of love the next.

    Happens to us all.

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