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-   -   FiancŽ dreamt I shot and killed her (https://www.askmehelpdesk.com/showthread.php?t=276652)

  • Nov 3, 2008, 10:49 AM
    earlnotta
    Fiancé dreamt I shot and killed her
    She woke up very scared and upset and said she dreamt that we and two other men were riding in a car. She was in the passenger seat and I was behind her. She didn't know the other two men. She said she saw that I had a gun and we started struggling over it and then I shot her hand. She said she was screaming out my name and then I shot her in the head and she died. She said that she remembers dying. What does this mean??
    In reality she is going through a lot of emotional distress. Her ex husband used to abuse her physically, psychologically, and sexually and she is trying to deal with it. Her ex husband is in prison and recently she was recalled to another court appearance concerning him which has put her under a lot of stress lately. We have also had some relationship problems about what is a normal and abnormal relationship lately.
    I just don't want her to take this dream literally and change the way she feels about me. I would never harm her in any way and love her with all of my heart. She wants to get counseling for her issues and I have been very supportive with that. Is my relationship in jeopardy because of this dream? Is she scared of me? How do I understand this and what do I do? Thank you for taking time for this. It means the world to me as she does. Thank you :)
  • Nov 4, 2008, 03:31 PM
    Alder

    I would say she is not scared of you, but rather is scared of being hurt again. Consciously, she may love and trust you deeply. But when a person has been deeply hurt, she is going to be a little "gun shy" about getting into a relationship where she is vulnerable again, on any level. The primitive part of our brain starts to get scared and it can only think of three things to do, fight, flight, or freeze. It takes a lot of hard, psychological work to uncover those kinds of subconscious wounds and heal them. Counseling is a good idea. Personally, I like counselors who put "holistic" or "transpersonal" in their yellow pages ads. But that's a matter of taste. At some point, maybe you could do the counseling with her. In any event, you can show her love, support, and encouragement as she works through this stuff.

    The dream itself isn't the sort of dream that you need a psychic to work with. The best interpretation is on the psychological level, not the psychic/shamanic. Without going into explicit detail, Sigmund Freud would have had a field day with this one!!

    It is not the dream that puts your relationship in jeopardy, but her past, unresolved emotional wounds. And yours, for that matter. None of us get to adulthood without getting hit with some psychologically damaging stuff along the way. In helping her heal, you can help yourself, too. Two people in a marriage (or marriage-like relationship) are pretty much at the same level of soul development. If you want to grow, it takes the two of you to tango.

    Blessings to both of you as you go along your life journey together.

    Alder

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