So I have been pretty much depressed for the last 2 years. It started when my ex-girlfriend and I had broken up. We had since then been off and on for a while. Now we are pretty much just over with. I miss her a lot. I miss the times we shared together and the feelings. I miss having someone so beautiful and caring want to be with me. Unfortunitly she really isn't that caring person towards me anymore. I know that in our hearts she and I both really love each other, but we were just dragging one another around for so long. I don't know how to fix all this. I see the new pictures of her that she puts online, and I just feel like crying. (we don't live in the same city anymore). When we were together I was in high school, and so was she... now I am in college and she is about to graduate.

What am I supposed to do with these feelings? It has been so long since I was able to be carefree. The only times I can is when I am drunk basically.

Now I have the option of going to school in Hawaii, and leaving all my friends and memories behind. I would be closer to my family, but I am just so scared of change. I always kind of wanted us to get back together in my heart, but I just want to move on 100%. I am not sure on what to do anymore. I have been feeling like this for way to long...

You are adrift and stuck. That is going to require professional help so you can get your life back on track. Living in the past and having no direction makes for a very unhappy life. Feeling sorry for yourself is a luxury you can't afford here.

Good Luck to you going forward,

Change is good and it may just be what you have needed all along. If you countinue down the path you are on it going to lead to a;ot more heart ache and pain.
So pull yourself together and move on, she has now its your turn.
Go have fun in Hawaii, you have been given this door out of where you are why are you trying to shut it.

Its always painful when you break up that's human it what we do with it that makes us the person that we are..

I really like your quote that you used Michelle. "It's what we do with it that makes us the person that person that we are."

I am ready for some change, and I am ready for things to get better, I just fear that things will only get worse. It seems for the last few months no matter how hard I try in anything, school, sports, relationship things always stay the same, or they just don't go anywhere. It gets tedious after a while.

Now I am trying to Apply for an Internship at Disney World, so we will see how that goes. I am thinking that leaving for a few months and taking a break from school would help me find out who I am.