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-   -   Don't understand boys (https://www.askmehelpdesk.com/showthread.php?t=275950)

  • Nov 1, 2008, 10:54 AM
    MANDMO 91
    Don't understand boys
    OK I have a lot of guys that really like and stuff, and sopme of them I would consider my best friends that I would love to hang out with all the time. Especially this one guy! He is so so sweet and so nice and perfect ! And he really really likes me, everyone can tell and so can I but I keep telling him I am not looking for a relationship. The only problem is that I am like 6 ft and he is way shorter than me but honestly so so cute! Anyway, I kind of sort of have feelings for him too but I don't think I want to experminet with those feelings and go further cause everyone including my parents make fun of the height difference, bu anyway I told him not looking for a relationship and he completely understood that and I was a amazed usually once I tell a guy I am not looking for a relationship but still want to be friends theystop talking to me a lot but this guy was different! I would brag to all the girls to show them how amazing of a friend I have found cause he is so so nice. But he asked my friend the other day if I like him and she said that I thought of him as a really good friend and respected out relationship. Then now he is all depressed around me the past couple of days and ignoring me at school a bit! He always gives me like 10 thousand hugs everyday but none yesterday and when I asked him if he was upset at me he said no. And he texted me the othr day and said we needed to talk! I am so sad cause I want this guy to be my best friend for life and I want everythign to go back to how it was! I was actually so happy and no one ever made me feel so spcial before in my life!@ I am used to guys lying to me just to get me to think they are sweet but his words are genuine! How can I explain to him how much I love him... as a friend but want to just remain really really good friends
  • Nov 1, 2008, 01:38 PM
    ladybug89
    Just be honest. Lol of course don't tell him you think he's too short, but let him know you are attracted to him like that, but like you said you just don't want a relationship. That way he doesn't feel like his spirits broke, and he made a but out of telling his best friend he has a crush on her. That's what pushes guys away, when they feel like they made a fool of themselves and he as no chance anyway so why bother? So just let him know how you dell, and things should go back to normal, if not and you really truly like him like you say then you shouldn't let the hight difference get in the way. (not that many guys come in big sizes any more) lol. Try being honest first and see how it goes. GOOD LUCK!
  • Nov 1, 2008, 03:29 PM
    jrsg

    This guy really likes you.
    When your friend told him you thought of him as a friend, he knew then that he wouldn't have a relationship with you. He is probably depressed a bit right now (as any guy would be) but he will get over it.
    When I get turned down by a girl I really like, I usually avoid them for a few days. It is almost too painful for me to see them, and know that I don't have a chance to be with them. He may be doing the same thing.

    I would just give it some time. If it continues, maybe say something. Tell him how much you value your friendship, and how you don't want to lose that.

    However, if the height difference is the ONLY reason you don't want a relationship with him, then I say put that aside. Don't worry about what other people say, and think. Don't let something as simple as his or your height come between what could be great relationship. Is that the only reason you won't date him?

    Good luck,
    Let us know what you decide to do.
  • Nov 1, 2008, 09:46 PM
    EN Ken
    Well, sadly, you can't have it both ways.

    He likes you so he's incapable of being friends with you. That friendship that you thought you had with him, was not really a friendship. That was him being with you because he really likes you and now that it's come out, you need to make a choice.

    You can decide not to have a relationship with him and he'll likely disappear and find a girl who will actually return his feelings openly. To be honest, if that guy came to me for advice, I would tell him to move on and that the girl is trying to have things both ways. It's not healthy for anyone to pine over someone who refuses to be with them.

    Or you can decide that your feelings for him and having him in your life is more important than what your parents are going to say. You can decide that he's a great enough guy that you're willing to be with him despite what other people will say about the two of you and your heights.

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