I kissed my friend and feel guilty
I've been with my boyfriend for 4 months. When he met me he knew what I was all about. Most of my friends are males. I grew up with a group of boys (I was a tomboy growing up, not anymore.. lol) and am still friends with them 'till this day. My best friend is a male for goodness sakes. My boyfriend has a hard time dealing with it and it makes it hard on me at time. Long story short a friend of mine passed away so after the viewing my friends and I went to a local bar to drink our sorrows away, the boyfriend got upset (I even invited him asking him to join me and he declined) and we got into a HUGE argument. I told him I couldn't continue being with him if he couldn't accept that I had mostly male friends. I was upset and started drinking more and more. I was wasted by the end of the night and kissed a friend of mine that I know. I feel so guilty, don't know if I should say anything. My boyfriend and I talked this morning and left it at "we'll talk later and figure out wheter or not we should continue this relationship or not". I feel like I cheated. I told him it was over and I said some hurtful things to him and vice versa. We kind of made up this morning but I still don't feel it's okay that I kissed someone even though we were "broken up" because technically it's not a real break up. I just don't know whether I should mention it. I would NEVER EVER do this again. I've been miserable all day, crying and just non stop thinking about it. If I tell him I know 100% that it's the end of us. I have no feelings for my friend whatsoever. I'm not sure if I did it because I was angry and obviously my judgement was impaired but I feel like crap and need advice! PLEASE HELP.