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-   -   What are the chances of this happening? (https://www.askmehelpdesk.com/showthread.php?t=273866)

  • Oct 26, 2008, 03:04 PM
    77ssmith
    What are the chances of this happening?
    I live in Illinois, I am a 19 year old unmarried mother. I go to school, work, and take care of my son. My son is 5 months old and the father is an alcoholic drug addict. He has had many run in's with the law, his license is currently suspended for two more years, he does not go to school, he lives with his mom and they are not financially stable. He has not seen his son in months, he is not on the birth certificate because he was too drunk to get to the hospital and sign it. Also my son has my last name. He has a tendency to randomly get sober for like a month, I am worried that when he decides to do this again he will take me to court for partial custody. He would have to request DNA since he is not on the birth certificate, can I refuse this DNA test, and if I couldn't, what are the chances that he would get weekends? I am terrified to death this would happen because I know he can present himself very well in a courtroom and he is an extremely good liar. I have no proof proving his alcoholism other than his record. What are the chances of him getting weekends? Supervised visitation I could handle, but I can no way ever hand my son over to this alcoholic drug addict for a whole weekend. He would end up just taking my son with him to get drunk at a friends house. I can't sleep at night worrying about this. Any advice or information on his chances of getting weekends?
  • Oct 26, 2008, 03:19 PM
    stinawords

    If he goes to court and the judge orders the DNA test then yes you have to submit to the test. All you can do is show his record to the judge and hope that it will make him/her lean toward supervised visitation or even just day time visitation with out over nights for a while anyway. But really it is all up to the judge and what they think is in the best interest of the child. I don't see a judge awarding weekends right away because that would be tramatic to the child but if he keeps up whatever visitation he is awarded and there are no problems with it, it would build up to that fairly quickly. This is exactly why many people here will point out that you are the one who has the choice as to who the father of your child(ren) are no protection is 100% so by choosing to have a sexual relationship you open yourself up to these situations. You can always hope that he never files and that you never need government assistance.
  • Oct 26, 2008, 03:28 PM
    ScottGem

    If he goes to court for custody/visitation, a DNA test will be ordered and you will have no choice in the matter.

    So you need to firm up proof of his addictions. Your word is not going to be enough. Its not going to look good that you chose to have a relationship and engage in sexual intercourse with this person.
  • Oct 26, 2008, 04:08 PM
    Scared gota dui

    Records speak for themselves.
  • Oct 26, 2008, 04:21 PM
    Fr_Chuck

    He can force a DNA test though the courts, and yes, he can get some level of visits, perhaps supervised at first. It will be up to you to prove he is a danger to the child.

    You will at that point get child support ordered, even if it is the min amount

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