:eek:Last year the one and only Magprob won the contest. No prizes, just the challenge of taking the BEST HALLOWEEN POEM title away from Mag! So go for it. Let it all hang out, gross, scary, funny... any style! Anything goes;)
Last submit should be on October 29th...
This is last years winner, by Magprob:
Glen The Monster by magprob copyright 2007

Deep from the bowls of a churning, burning hell
Where a good man don't go and won't fare well
Came crawling a monster so vile and indescribably mean
It was all dressed up and ready for Halloween.

It had one green horn poking from out of Its head
It was dragging a carcass that smelled long dead
Its claws were crusted with filth and dried blood
And under Its toenails was unbelievable crud

As It ran past me screaming It snarled and swiped
I could tell that Its funky butt had never been wiped
Its fur was matted and slimy, stinking of disease
When It disappeared I could finally breath

Carefully I followed the stench to the small town below
What business could It have and where would It go?
Down along main street the odor did whirl
I quietly followed afraid I might hurl

Then again I spied It on the corner of main and third
It was squatting and eating the bones of a dead bird
When suddenly It jumped and like a flash It ran
Down through the ally knocking over a garbage can

I took a short cut around the block as fast as I could
Thinking to myself this may come to no good
I hid in the bushes watching as quiet as a mouse
That's when I saw It walk up to the house

Cautiously It approached and then knocked on the door
It stood there waiting, waiting for a minute or more
Then dear ole Miss Smith open up and did appear
That was the moment I froze in complete fear

Trick or Treat! It screeched at the top of its raspy voice
Miss Smith let out a laugh and said “take your choice”
It took the bowl and with one finger It stirred round
It stirred till finally Its favorite was found

It handed her the bowl, grunted and ran straight towards me
That 's when I finally could no longer hold my pee
Five paces from me it stopped and It sheepishly said
“Oh yummy Me love dem LemonHead!”

Time to go Trick or Treat
My web is empty nothing to eat
The bats ate my bugs, all gooey green
So time to eat candy on Halloween

It's the time of the year, when I can crawl safely-
When people won't scream and say that they hate me-
Crawling around without fearing a squishing
The time of the year I go about wishing..
Happy Halloween! to the ghouls and the goblins
The witches and vampires in their old wooden coffins
So watch out for the Spyder or I'll eat out your brain
I'll be back in my web on the following day
Happy Halloween!

Spyder, I love it! You are the first so you get points for that too;)

Cool :)
It is seriously my FAVORITE holiday!

Done!

A Trick For a Treat
By Magprob
Copyright 2008

Little Jimmy knocked at the spooky old house
Dressed in his costume just like Micky Mouse
Patiently he waited for someone to open the door
Then heard foot steps shuffle across the floor

Feeble fingers fumbled at the lock and the latch
Out poked a head wearing a crusty old eye patch
His teeth were yellow, the few that were there
Little Jimmy thought he saw bugs in his hair

The dirty old creep eyed Jimmy with a frown
Hacked up a loogie then swallowed it back down
He scratched his butt and then picked his nose
Then asked Jimmy, “You're a rat I suppose?

“I'm Micky Mouse, not a rat!” Jimmy said
The creepy old bugger just scratched his head
“Well, I won't be giving a treat without a trick
So do what you do and by damn be quick”

“I don't know any tricks” as he stepped back
Feeling as if the old creep was setting a trap
The old creep reached and grabbed Jimmy tight
Pulling him into the house as dark as the night

“Then if you can't do a trick in trade for a treat
I'll give a Hershey bar if you will just rub my feet”
He pulled off his sneakers that were crusty and worn
The first thing Jimmy saw was a three inch corn

The corn was attached to the side of his big toe
With smaller warts and corns every half inch or so
His toe nails were long and twisted and green
And his toes were caked with toe jam all in between

Jimmy took one sniff then turned green then blue
He ran and dove out the window and away he flew
The old creep laughed a belly laugh that all could hear
Then shook his head, turned up the TV and cracked a beer

That's awesome! I love storytelling poems :)

LOLOLOL, Mag geeze you are good. Were you thinking of my feet when you wrote that? I already told you my feet were alright;)
I think you should get your gEEtar and sing it, then post it on Youtube and you will be a big star.

Eeeew, you have feet like that? I may have eight legs but I keep my feet in impeccable shape ;)

Yes Start, Your feet are my inspiration.

*throws up in mouth

Throws up in mouth... Humm... that could be a really good poem.

You're welcome to make a stab at it. The spider who at too much brain-;)

T'was All Hallows Eve, and what should appear,
A shiny big cooler, with spirits... and beer!

With I in my boxers and a date on her back,
We both settled in for a night in the sack.

When what to my dismay at the door did appear,
A goblin, a witch, and small creatures to fear!

I jumped to my feet, as the doorbell was ringing,
I saw kids with bright bags, was there something they're bringin?

They yelled trick or treat, these goblins and ghouls,
Surely they must be beggars, should they not be in school?

I asked what their tricks were, just to be sure,
They said we want candy, are you stupid, old sir?

I said I have no candy for you my small lad,
I may have some apples, but they just might be bad.

The eyes of the goblins welled up with tears,
It's not apples we want, it's that cooler of beer.

The shiny beer cooler, and the ghouls so sad,
If it gets rid of these kids, it can't be all bad.

I explained with a sly glance, it's patience I lack,
Go play tricks on the neighbors, I've got a girl in my sack.

:p

LMAO Nice Starby, nice:)

Oh, an no Spyder, Mag is just kidding, just like I was;)

Just kidding. She doesn't have a three inch corn... hers are much smaller... really.

Keep 'em comin'... I am enjoying this one ;)

I know you were kidding... so was I :)
Your poetry is inspirational Starbs :)

YOU GUYS!! Today is the last day... let give it till tomorrow. Everyone seems to be scared this year... Weenies! Come on, give it your best shot. Gosh!

There was a young ghoul from Nantucket
Crooked nose so long he could suck it
With an evil grin
He wiped off his chin
... and said hand me a kleenex you idiot!

Don't ask... It's early and I'm not really even awake... LOL!

Although Starby's and Spydy's poems were wonderful;) I think Magatory wins unless someone comes in here and blows everyone away...

Happy Halloween!