Ok every one lets tell a story or 2 to relieve our daily stress I will start it off by the following words and we will see how many follows and how far do we get to the ending.



As I walk into the room I see the sun fluttering through the blinds on the window!

I could tell the corpse had been there for at least a week. Maggots had already eaten most of the brains that were splattered on the wall. I noticed a box of cheese puffs and half a Pepsi on the table next to the corpse. I decided I would help myself. Why not? It would be another twenty minutes until the cops arrived anyway.

I kept looking at the corpse, as I was snacking... It began to creep me out. I shuffled the chair away. Just then, the corpse got up! It started walking towards me! I didn't know what it was. Clearly, it was dead only 5 minutes ago... It's a ZOMBIE! I ran down the hall as fast as I could...

As I turned down the hall to run, I dropped my pepsi. And in the my shock there was the zombie.. picking up my pepsi

"Here you go" Said The Zombie..
"...Wait....your not going to eat me?"
"No" Said the zombie
"Why" I asked "Aren't you supposed to be like..BRAINS"
"Oh" as it laughed a laugh that sounded like a canary drowing.. "I'm a vegetarian"

"Well," the zombie began, "I was a vegetarian. That is, until I started craving pork chops. I started craving pork chops one day to the point that I could not get them out of my mind. Sizzling, fried to a crispy brown around the edges. The fat crispy and juicy. It got to the point that I could even smell them. I would wake up late in the night, I would smell wonderful pork chops and I could hear them sizzling in the pan. It finally got to the point where I was completely desparate. I just couldn't take it anymore."

"I don't know why I craved them so much, I actually find myself craving a lot of foods lately." Just then, a baby poped out! "Oh, maybe that is why," the zombie exclaimed. And then another one. And another, and another... They continued to just fall out! They were alllll over the place!

I was shocked at the sudden "explosion" of the zombies spawn, one, then another, then more, gushing from its decaying body. They would land on the floor with a sickening thud as if they were guts landing in the disposal shute of a slaughter house floor. There, they would begin shaking and writhing in what appeared to be excrusiating pain then suddenly, as if qued by some internal clock, they would jump and begin thrashing about on the apartment floor.
The zombie spawn would wriggle across the floor, propelled by some internal mechanism much like a snake. Their skin was bluish, quite the same as a deep, multi colored contusion, glistening in the dull, afternoon light, looking as if they were the primordial placenta of a long extinct nocturnal creature that had been suddenly dredged from the depths of a stinking steamy bog. A stinking steamy bog from another planet.

They were alien zombies! More commonly referred to as "zombaliens!" These were the worst kind, too...

When the reality finally sank in, that these indeed were real Zombaliens, or ETZs (Extra Terrestrial Zombies) as they had been named by the world famous Scientist and zombie hunter, Dr. Rienhard derKlosselviener, I felt an impending doom in the pit of my guts.
I remembered reading in Dr. Rienhard derKlosselvieners book, Extra Terrestrial Zombies Ate My Baby, available at Amazon.com, that this particular type of zombie loved nothing better than human flesh. Here was I, human flesh, standing in the middle of their birthing ground, holding a half drank Pepsi and a box of Cheezie Puffs. I quickly came to the conclusion that I must make a hasty exit. As I looked around the room, I realized that the exits were blocked by the ETZs that were piling up waist high. More and more were being birthed at such a high rate of speed that it made my head swim. The stifling smell of Alien afterbirth fill my lungs, making my guts heave in pure repulsion. Sweat was dripping down my face and into my eyes leaving me half blind. The breathable air in the room seemed to be vacuumed out with nothing but a horrific stench to replace it.
I stumbled towards the rear room of the apartment, trying to find a small gulp of fresh air and a way out. I came to the bedroom where I found the closet door. Maybe, just maybe I could hide in the closet until these things decided to move out. Just as my hand felt the closet door handle, the door began shaking as if a thunderous avalanche of three foot boulders broke loose on the other side. The entire apartment building was shaking as if it might collapse at any moment. Just then, the closet door exploded open, throwing me six feet against the bedroom wall.
I may have been unconscious for a moment or two. Maybe more. When I looked around the room, only a few of the Extra Terrestrial Zombies Spawn were left in the apartment. They were cued up and slithering into the closet where, from some unseen source, a red light was throbbing to the sound of a deep guttural, half breathing, half moaning groan. As I watched the last Spawn slither into the closet and disappear, I crawled up to my feet and cautiously approached the closet to see where they had all gone. The reddish, throbbing light had dissipated. The moaning groaning sound had subsided. There was only darkness. I peered into the darkness and realizing there was nothing left, I started to back up, away from this grotesque thing I had just witnessed when I felt it, behind me. The Extra Terrestrial Zombie! I whirled around just as the zombie tackled me into the dark closet. Up, up, up we fell in a tangled embrace, higher and higher into sheer darkness, ever higher and higher, higher, and higher, up, up, up, further and further up, up, up, even higher and even more up... THUD!