I am 32 years old. I was dating a wonderful guy 27 for 3 years. I have a 7 yearold from a previous relationship. He was wonderful with him, so great. I took him for granted and I was really stubborn, rigid and controlling at times. I also smoked cigarettes which I know he didn't like, especially around him. I would get upset and yell or get mad and he would get upset and get really quiet. But, on the upside we would have wonderful times going canoeing, hiking all sorts of things together and we would have a ton of fun. Anyway, we broke up about 6 months. Ago. I took it bad, I was so sad but I used it as a chance to get my act together and work on my anger/controlling issues and I also quit smoking. Not for him but because these were things I didn't like about myself either, things I knew weren't =me= but the result and reaction of stress and fear and insecurity. So anyway now we are still in touch here and there via email, and I really still have strong feelings for him, I think if I had dealt with these issues of mine before our relationship would have been great. He is fine via email, but maybe detached and distant and although I have apologized for all I've done, he just kind of ignores it. I don't want to look like a jerk, but he was great for my son and I did really love him and I would like the chance to show him how much I appreciate him and what he did for me. How can I best let him know this without being too bold (this is my problem in the past) and showing him I am sincere? Thanks so much!:confused:

Well it sounds like you had a great well rounded guy it's to bad you made things go south. But that's not the end of the world for you. Some times you have to breakup and spend some time apart to realize what you really did wrong and change and it sounds like you did exactly that. Some times when things are done they are just that, done. You have to be prepared and strong because this is the most likely route that future events will take so you have to be strong for your kid and yourself.

If you want this guy back your going to have to really prove to him that you have changed your ways and your going to have to figure out a way to rekindle his emotions for you. So start maybe asking him out to lunch or maybe just start with a nice long phone call to explain some things to him and just in general try to be his friend NOT his girlfriend because you have no chance of just jumping back into this great relationship with him. If you can win his friendship back then you might have a chance of seeing if things will head your way again. But don't be surprised if they don't. If things don't go your way don't be sour at least you will have a great friend back =).

If you can't stand him being just your friend it might be best to just get over him all together and cut all contact and just start no contact at all.

Tell him what you told us, no one can fault you for being honest..

Just tell him exactly how you feel. How else would you get your feelings out? You can show them but you only keep in contact through Via mail. The only way he will know how you feel is if you are BOLD about it!! Maybe you shld ask him to meet you for coffee or something and maybe he will relize how much he misses you and that you really have changed. Maybe to him when you write or tell him these things he doesn't fully believe it because he don't really know the new you he only knows and sees the old you no matter how much you say you have changed. So I would advise seeing him in person and showing him the NEW you!! IT never hurts to try. PLUS like they say you can talk the talk BUT can you actually walk it? Maybe that is what he is thinking. Hope this helps you!

The way you explained to us it's amzing why don't you just tell him like he is also human and they way you told us about him telling me he is good guy for you just be honest .
There is no person who is honest this time of the world just tell him what you feel reals it and you did good job by quiting the smoking that nice step more important then every thing .

thanks so much everyone for all the great advice. I did email him pretty much what I said and basically just let him know that I value his friendship over all and hope that we can continue that much, hoping that maybe this will bring more in the future. We both made a lot of mistakes, you know we all do, but this is one instance that makes me feel like id rather pick up from where we left off and make it great instead of starting all over, you know? Anyway, you're right joe, I think I'd even be happy just to have him as a friend because he was a good one with a ton in common with me. And who knows, maybe he just won't be able to resist me now that I've grown up and become healthier! :) I think I'll just go really slow and see where things happen, maybe the best things come with patience, no? Thanks soooo much everyone!