Hello everyone I'm new at this. I'm really insecure about myself and I don't know why. I get told all the time that I'm beautiful but when I see the model's and women on T.V. I don't feel like it. I sometimes wish I looked like them. How do I stop being so insecure?

Well really all you can do is accept yourself. Give yourself an honest rating on what you think you look like and if you don't like it improve yourself.

You can spend some time every week doing things that will boost yourself image. Running or some sort of active sport will not only keep you in shape but will trigger your mind to release endorphins and melt away stress and make you a much happier person who will be less likely to think negatively of yourself. Or spend some time searching for a new hairstyle or anything to improve yourself. Constant self improvement has given me a great self image and boosted my confidence in all aspects of life. Just don't let it get out of hand =)

Chances are that you are being way to harsh on yourself image. No ones perfect so try to have more confidence in yourself and remember if you don't like it change it.

And honestly your throwing yourself image away when you compare yourself to media. They take hours putting on make up getting the perfect camera angle and lighting to look like that. Chances are that if you took the same preparation you would look just as beautiful. It's kind of like the same effect when young men judge their preformance in bed with porn. It is the top of the preformance chain and real life standards are not nearly as high.

Even the models in the mags are Air brushed and touched up..

I know because I have worked in that area.
They air brush your photos
Even on some girls who have big hips they photoshop them down

So what you are seeing.. is not what is really there.

If you live up to these ideals. You will neve be happy

You have to be happy with in yourself

Even these models have flaws. You have got to find your good points!

Ditto taking care of your appearance and physical wellbeing as a matter-of-course. Even so, I think magazines do us all a big favour when they catch hollywood stars looking plain and dishevelled, just like the rest of us do a lot of the time.

If you already know your beautiful, why not relax and enjoy it? At the same time, do yourself a favour by keeping in mind that there will always be someone more beautiful to look at, someone less attractive, someone richer, smarter, younger, older, wiser, etc. Instead of setting yourself apart the way magazines mostly portray beauty to be, be part of the chaos where all kinds of beauty are possible and can be appreciated.

I have two friends I call my soul-sisters. One is obese and struggles with her self-image, to the extent she tends to be insecure in groups and stays home a lot. Yet everyone loves her for who she is. She is studying to become a counsellor and is a graphic artist. She is honest, open minded and creative, is attentive when she's with you and always has something kind or encouraging to say. She is also independent and likes her life the way it is, no matter how imperfect her appearance. I trust her implictly. The other friend is very beautiful (Chilean), is a brilliant salsa dancer, fit and healthy and loves to be out with friends. She could practically have any man she wanted -- if she wanted. The fact is she doesn't, since she's more interested in being with friends who she knows she can trust and enjoy being with. She is kind, caring and smart. Somewhere in the middle is me, and they both love me for who I am. We'll always be there for each other.

When you're with someone who knows all about you and loves and accepts you for who you are, their appearance literally melts away into insignificance, since how you feel is much more real. It's what makes your friendship last. The most reassuring thing you have to look forward to is that there will always be someone who thinks you're perfect the way you are.

I hope you start appreciating yourself more than you have been.

I did some modeling when I was younger and what has been said here is very true. Image is important, but to me a smile is the best part of your face. If you are being told that you are beautiful I would tend to believe that you are.

I hardly ever took much of the advice given to me when I was younger, I wanted to believe what "I" wanted to believe. My life would have been so much better and easier had I listened.

So, here comes the advice...

Honestly hon, character, honesty, attitude and a smile are the "magic" pills... It is amazing how people respond to these qualities.

Example: before you make a phone call (no one can see you), put on a big smile. You will see the result in most cases immediately, the person on the other end sees attitude, confidence and your "invisible smile." Try it and let us know... K?

Many studies have been done on this. One that I saw recently had 6 college students view facial pictures of about 50 people of all ages and indicate whether they liked this person on first sight or not. As always, the greater percentage of those that they liked had nice smiles on the faces.

Modeling is not real life and many of them, actors and actresses, have way too many insecurities. Their life is mainly how they look, and I am sure you know that is only "skin deep."

Stringer

Well I am in the same boat. Even though my family and friends tell me I'm pretty or whatever, I still feel ugly because of birthmarks I have on my face that I think people stare at instead of me...

But whenever I feel like... my mom told me to write on one side of a piece of paper all the things I like about myself (physically, mentally,etc.), and on the other side all the things I don't... if the things I don't outweigh the things I do...

Then all the things I write that I don't like, I make a vow to forget about them then and there, it doesn't always work but when I'm really insecure like before a date or something,

i also remind myself over and over that my creator created a beautiful work of art, and by being insecure, im questioning his artistic ability! lol

hope that helps = )

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Originally Posted by Stringer

Honestly hon, character, honesty, attitude and a smile are the "magic" pills.... It is amazing how people respond to these qualities.

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So true.