I don't know where to start. This goes back about 5 years when we first met. The first month we met everything was awsome. No arguing, we trusted each other, spent time together, no problems, it was perfect! He was at a friends house and I was working that night. Later when my shift was up he met up with me at work and told me that his ex showed up at his friends house where he was. I was like OK, no biggy, because I trusted him and he had never given me a reason not to! Anyway about a month later we are moved in together and I get home from work and he finally gets home and says, out of nowhere, he has something to tell me. OK what was it... he said back in the past something happened between me and another girl. I was like OK what? He said you know her too. Ok so I said what are you talking about? Well he said it was at a party and I ended up passing out on her bed and when I woke up he said his pants were half down and he thinks he had foreplay with her. He finally told me the girl was his friends girlfriend. This happened before his friend and her got together. So I'm like are you kidding... where did this come from and are you serious! He's like NO actually nothing happened! WOW, so now I am furious and like what the heck. Why is he making this up or did it really happen. To this day and this was 5 years ago, I don't know the truth as to why he made upi such a rumor or if it really happened. I mean why would you bring up something like that if it was before us, especially if it never happened. I asked him why if it didn't happen would you make it up... his answer.. I don't know why! Then after I kind of let it go we were invited to a 4th of July party. He told me he talked to the friend that was throwing the party to see who will be there. He said no my ex will not be there, because now after that whole incident I lost trust! So we get there and guess what about an hour later she walks through the door with a friend of his! Yeah he did know she was coming he told me later after there was nothing I could have done about it. He said he lied to me because he wanted to go. The next day I was supposed to go to work and I come home early and I caught him chatting with his ex on the computer. He didn't think it was a big deal! A few months go by I'm between not sure if I can really trust this guy or what so I stay and find out he lies again. I was working overtime and finally a Sunday off. We haven't been spending much time together and he tells me Sunday they have to do inventory at work. So of course I believe him. He gets up early that morning dresses for work and heads out the door. I try calling him that afternoon and no answer doesn't return calls. He finally comes home that night and not a word. Says work took a long time. A day later his friend slips up and I find out they all of his friends went to a car show all day! His answer again was I don't know why I lied! We really argue and says he'll be upfront from now on . After he did it again I finally took a break and went back to my hometwon in another state. I really missed him and things got better, so I came back. Nothing really changed. Anytime he wanted to do something he would make plans with his friends and then tell me where and what! NEVER made plans with me. I've been too blind to see that! If by chance we were to do something like 4th July or pool or bowling he would invite his friends. Anyway 4 years later I get pregnant and stupid me I wanted to do things right and get married. Two weekends before we were to get married we all went out to drink and one of his friends starts going off at me during dinner at a restaruant in front of everyone and I am 4 months pregnant. His friend called me all sorts of names and blamed me for things and go in my face. He didn't stand up to his friend at all or say anything. Right there I should have left! So we were his ride that night and I made my fioncee leave him there he can find his own ride! I told his friend he was not welcome to any part of the wedding he was no longer a friend and just not to be around us anymore. Well what happened after we got married he started talking to his friend again and would delete his number so I wouldn't find out. He was playing golf with him and going out to drink and get lunch and for a few months before I found out he would make up all these excuses what he was doing. As much as his friend hurt me for no reason he went behind my back like nothing ever happened. His answer was he doesn't know why he did that but he said he's not just going to drop a friend because of something stupid. I know this is a lot, but I should have left a long time a go right? I stayed because I love him and when I make him do something with me I have fun. I know it could be great but I am so overwhelmed and paranoid when he goes out with out me it's not fair.. and through all of this I have never done anything to him!! I am always honest no matter what. What shoud I do I really need advice to stay or go.

That's a tough decision, but youhave to do what id best for you and you baby. Your first priority is to insure that your baby is protected and safe. You have to do some serious sole searching and ask yourself if you want to live like this the rest of your like and what kind of role model is he to your child. How much longer can you take his lying, this must be just tearing you up inside...

I think you know the answer to your own question, I think your making the right decsion your better then that crap and you and your child deserve better. So go take control of your own life and you will see that you finally have so peace in your life.

Good luck
Michelle

I read your whole post and it was long. First, as you know, you stood through him with all his lies so by staying you accepting him and his ways and to top it off you marry him and now you have a family.

The friend was wrong for going off on you but your husband was more wrong for allowing it by not saying nothing and now he's sneaking around with him by hanging out with him and then lying about to you, bad yes. Would I be mad, yes. I can understand that's his wife but you are his wife, maybe him and the friend made up but I think the friend should man up and at least apology to you to keep the peace. Your husband should express that to him and even though you might not forget what happen at least you'll feel better.

What is done in the past is done. Not only do you have yourself to think about but now you have a child too. It sounds like you and your husband have a lot of issues from trust, communication, compromising, etc. Maybe counseling would help and you and your husband need to discuss this and seek the help needed to save this marriage otherwise your will be getting the "d" word. Maybe even a litte time apart would help clear your mind. You should write all the things you love and dislike about your husband and discuss them with your husband.