Hey,

I am very prone to over-thinking and feeling at a loss from day to day as I feel I don't know who I am or what I want in life.. I am 21 yrs old and in the prime of my life, yet tend to feel down quite often. How do you find yourself ? I am very keen to do cognitive theraphy as I think this will change the way I think about things so I am able to gain direction in life. Does anyone have views/results on cbt?

Thanks for reading :) xx

Do you have someone to care for? I mean, do u have a girlfriend? That is very iportant for your life, u need to share the load with someone and then u will see things more clear...

Ps: my english is not very good :D

Hi,

I had cognitive therapy for some other issues. I think it helps. You might be able to do it on your own. I suggest you make a list of your strengths and the activities you really enjoy. Be honest with yourself, write down whatever YOU enjoy and think is right not what the environment (family, friends, media) imposes on you. Sometimes, when the environment wants us to act differently from what our inner personality is at some stages of life we question ourselves and the way we are living. It is better that you figure it out as soon as possible and start living the life you want. It is difficult to know what you want after years of being thought how to act and how to live, but you can do it. It takes time and you should just understand that it is a normal process that has stages. You first question yourself then you recognize what you want and then you practically start to live your life, although you will have some of the previous behaviors since you have adopted yourself to them for so long. Try to understand yourself, what you are good at and what you enjoy to do. BUT do not make any life decisions at this stage. I mean if you are studying something or you are employed at a job, do not take the risk to quit that. Slowly and surely think about everything and try the new choices as a hobby and part time job then if you make sure this is what you want you can switch to the new job or activity. I do not recommend a relationship at this stage because if you are confused about who you are and what you want you will not have a clear understanding of who you want to be with. You have to first know yourself well and then choose a person that matches with you; otherwise you will hurt yourself and the other person.

For now, think about your past; see if you were forced to behave in spite of your inner personality. For example you might be an extrovert but were forced to be introvert, or visa versa. You can take a personality test called the “Myers Briggs”. It tells you what type of personality you have and what kind of job or activities are suitable for you. It is good that you know who you are now than after 20 years. You are young and have your whole life in front of you. It is up to you to choose how to do it. The important thing is to be honest with yourself and chose what you want not what others want for you. Parents some times want their children to fulfill their unaccomplished dreams which might be totally diverse from what is meant for the child.

Look at this website: Free personality tests: find out your type
You can take the test here and it is free, then find your code and read your personality type.

If you are college or university, talk to a counselor about it and they might have the test.

Good luck!