Ask Me Help Desk - My 2 yr old grandson

Hi I am in need of some advice.
I have a 2 yr old grandson who is very adorable, loved, and very fortunate that he has me and my husband.
Let me start by sharing that as of April of this yr my grandson has not seen his mother. My son has been providing and being attentive to his needs but right now his fiancée just gave birth to a little girl and he just got laid off. My grandson has been living since April with us and his father comes every day to see him. The reason my grandson is not living with my son is because he lives in a studio and he says that he does not want his child sleeping in uncomfortable means and facing hardships. Here in my house he has his bed, toys, and most important lots of love and affection. I don't want to go and get custody of him. But my son insists. We pay for his child care, and his medical needs. His mother termed his health insurance and now I am force to pay out of pocket. Can some one share some advice.

Maybe you need to go to court and get custody. The custody terms for you may not be the same as it was for him.
For one thing you could could get the child on your insurance. If you don't have insurance you may be able to get a medicaid card for him.
If you and your son ever agree on the son getting his child back, you could go to court and give the child back. In the mean time if you have custody you may find a lot of help out there for this child that you are unable to receive now.
I agree with you that this child is very lucky to have such great grandparents.

Is the fiancée, your grandsons mother, as you are unclear? I am all for helping with the grandchildren, do it myself, but the parents need to be doing there part.

If you get custody, you make sure there is a child support order, because its ridicules to be raising your sons child, while he is still making more babies.

Sorry to disappoint you more ma'am but not every child can live in a big house with a white picket fence and a Family dog. I honestly don't think it's legal to get custody for the reasons you are stating. You're children are facing hardships and that is forcing your grandson to suffer. In order to help, you may have to give up some money in order for it not to get too bad. But if you son transfers your grandson over to you for the sake of insurance then that is known as fraud. It is a federal crime and punishable by jail time. If something like that were legal, EVERYBODY would do it. They'd just find someone with insurance and just hand their children over to them until they got their lives back on track. And then transfer their children back. That's not how the law works. If you want to help, all you can do is watch your grandson while his parents try to get things in order. I know it sounds rough but there is no (legal) way out of paying out of your own pocket on this one.

I am sorry, no room in studio, sorry bull, he does not want to have to be a full time parent, why does he not move if he needs more space,

I know you want to defend your son, but while he is doing a little more than mother who is not even seeing the child, if he was really wanting to be a father he would. And it appears he is not living with the women who just had another child by him, and he is not living with them or raising that child either.

So anyway, you do what you want to do.

When I first at my daughter, me, her, and the dad, lived a studio. There's wasn't any room but we made it work until we could afford something bigger and as soon as we could we moved. Sometimes you have to work with what you got.

It great that your step up and took your grandson in but it takes money to raise a child. Regardless, if your son stops by and see him everyday you shouldn't have to pay for everything. There was times we I had jobs I didn't like but I did them because I had a child to support so I did what I had too. Luckily I've a great job now. You should held both parents reliable and I wished you could collect child support from the both of them.

Why don't the mother has custody of the son? I guess she is unfit and being an absent parent. I still think what your doing is great.

Quote:

Originally Posted by disappointed 1

hi i am in need of some advice.
I have a 2 yr old grandson who is very adorable, loved, and very fortunate that he has me and my husband.
Let me start by sharing that as of april of this yr my grandson has not seen his mother. My son has been providing and being attentive to his needs but right now his fiancee just gave birth to a lil girl and he just got laid off. My grandson has been living since april with us and his father comes every day to see him. The reason my grandson is not living with my son is because he lives in a studio and he says that he does not want his child sleeping in uncomfortable means and facing hardships. Here in my house he has his bed, toys, and most important lots of love and affection. I don't want to go and get custody of him. But my son insists. We pay for his child care, and his medical needs. His mother termed his health insurance and now i am force to pay out of pocket. Can some one share some advice.

What State? It is possible as a grandparent to get custody in some States much more easily than others.

If your son has little interest in caring for your grandson, then it would appear that you have to make sure his legal custody is very clear - and just that. Legal.

What is the mother's position in all of this?