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-   -   Why is it that I haven't had a long lasting relationship yet? (https://www.askmehelpdesk.com/showthread.php?t=261138)

  • Sep 16, 2008, 01:57 PM
    Sweet_Guy23
    Why is it that I haven't had a long lasting relationship yet?
    Through my experience with falling in love. The relationships that I have experienced never lasted long at all because the girl that I fell in for started feeling like she really loved me then through time they changed and eventually fall off.

    I've only fell in love with only 3 people. I am 23yrs old. You know? I mean I am a down-to-earth guy who likes to have fun, see places, likes the finer things in life. I am intelligent, talented, respectful, and a gentleman. Not a bad looking guy either. Maybe I fall in love too quickly instead of giving it time? IDK! I just don't understand why I haven't had a relationship that has lasted longer than several months!

    Maybe I am just falling for the wrong type of females or what? The thing in common about the 3 females that I did fall in love with were all between the age of 18-21.

    So how do I know when I am really in Love with someone and how do I know when someone is in Love with me for real? Not infactuation!! HELP ME!!
  • Sep 17, 2008, 08:23 AM
    Witchywoman1212
    Do you need me to cook up a spell for you?
  • Sep 17, 2008, 09:32 AM
    happy_jester
    Quote:

    The girl that I fell in for started feeling like she really loved me then through time they changed and eventually fall off.
    Don't feel bad about this,it's what relationships are for! Some will work out &
    Some won't. It often happens that way.

    I notice that you give (quite a LONG) list of your good points. Do you tell all
    Of these to the girls you meet?

    It would seem,to me,that you're rather too sure of yourself.
    This would put people off as you "come across" as being arrogant & pompous. :(

    You'll just have to put this down to experience & learn from it!
  • Sep 17, 2008, 09:45 AM
    brokenhearted1515
    There's a reason for each why it never worked out. And you'll know that reason when you find the right one. So for now just enjoy life and date, and it will happen when its right! Best of luck.
  • Sep 17, 2008, 10:00 AM
    ChihuahuaMomma
    You say that you dated them each for a couple of months and FELL IN LOVE with them. While it's possible to fall in love with more than one person, and to love them early on, but is it really likely that you truly were in love with all three of these girls?

    --How soon into the relationship did you say, "I love you"?

    Also, there are other variables. If you are wanting of a healthy relationship so much, you may exude that onto the girl. She may feel that you are wanting to get serious too soon.

    We can't really tell you what you've done wrong because we were not there. Perhaps talk to one of them. Ask. What would it hurt? It will teach you a lesson for the next relationship.

    Remember, slow and steady wins the race.

    Don't invest all your time, emotions, and love right away. Let the friendship turn into what it will. And things will happen when they need to.
  • Sep 17, 2008, 10:17 AM
    epiphany
    Please don't take this wrong, but all of your questions you keep copying and making different titles. I am not sure if you just keep trying and hope that someone has a magic answer for you or what.

    The truth is there isn't a magic answer or magic bullet with love. People fall in love, people fall out of love, people get hurt, people keep trying.

    I can say that if you stress this much and analyze this much in all of your relationships, that might not be helping your situation. You are still young (and that is not being said as a brush off response) all I am trying to point out to you is you should relax and enjoy the time you have with people that you care for more. Don't dissect it just do it.

    All failed relationships do is give you tools and learning experiences that help you prepare for the right person who will turn up eventually and stick around. Not everyone finds the love of their life at 20, 30, even 40.. it shows up when it does.. you can't rush or stress over it. I know others have told you this in other threads, and we all realize you are hurting now.. but trust us it will happen when it happens.
  • Sep 17, 2008, 10:19 AM
    ChihuahuaMomma
    Quote:

    Originally Posted by epiphany
    Please don't take this wrong, but all of your questions you keep copying and making different titles. I am not sure if you just keep trying and hope that someone has a magic answer for you or what.

    Please don't post multiple times, the same question. Your question will get answered just the same. And this is called SPAM. Not to mention it confuses the people that are giving you advice.
  • Sep 17, 2008, 12:06 PM
    Sweet_Guy23
    You are right. Ima stop reposting questions. Sorry! But you are I need to in the words of someone "CHILL"
  • Sep 17, 2008, 12:17 PM
    ChihuahuaMomma
    Quote:

    Originally Posted by Sweet_Guy23
    You are right. Ima stop reposting questions. Sorry! But you are I need to in the words of someone "CHILL"

    Can you please speak English? I don't understand what you are trying to say here.
  • Sep 17, 2008, 12:35 PM
    Sweet_Guy23
    Im sorry. I will stop reposting questions. Someone I used to date once tool me to CHILL
  • Sep 17, 2008, 01:09 PM
    talaniman
    Chill is good. But I can understand all the questions. Maybe the best thing is merge your posts, and just keep asking questions on the one post. Less confusing that way. You can PM a moderator, to help you.

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