Ask Me Help Desk - Can he take the baby fron ny to Washington?

Hi
I am 7 weeks pregnant. I was with the dad for 3 months. When he found out I was pregnant he spilt and left ny state to go to washingotn state.

He told me he does not want to be with me but wants the baby. He told me he is going to prove to the courts I have mental problems and take the baby to Washington.

Can he do this? I can see when the child reaches a certain age the child going there for a week or two a year, but as a infant or baby can a court want a child to travel cross county.

Can he really go to the court and tell them I am crazy. He said that I call him so much he is going to show them the records and that's why I will loose the child. Will nys really take a baby from its mom? At this point I am wondering if I should even have the baby if the fight has already started...

Also he said he will never get a job so he won't have to pay support. Can he do that? I always thought there was a minimun each month required even if one is unemployed.

If he is not here through the pregnancy does he really have rights?

Quote:

Originally Posted by help4mommy2b

hi
i am 7 weeks pregnant. i was with the dad for 3 months. when he found out i was pregnant he spilt and left ny state to go to washingotn state.

he told me he does not want to be with me but wants the baby. he told me he is going to prove to the courts i have mental problems and take the baby to washington.

can he do this? i can see when the child reaches a certain age the child going there for a week or two a year, but as a infant or baby can a court want a child to travel cross county.

can he really go to the court and tell them i am crazy. he said that i call him so much he is going to show them the records and thats why i will loose the child. will nys really take a baby from its mom? at this point i am wondering if i should even have the baby if the fight has already started....

also he said he will never get a job so he wont have to pay support. can he do that? i always thought there was a minimun each month required even if one is unemployed.

if he is not here through the pregnancy does he really haave rights?

If you are not married he HAS no rights as the father until he goes to Court and GETS rights by proving - undoubtedly through DNA - that he's the father.

If you don't want to acknowledge him as the father do NOT put him on the birth certificate - that CAN give him rights outside of a Court hearing.

If he wants custody he would have to prove to the Court that you are unfit, that you present a danger to the child. The Court will address the issues of custody AND visitation after reviewing all the proof presented in Court.

If you are calling and harassing him I would stop - it won't look good for you although it doesn't make you crazy or unable to care for a child. I also don't think I would talk to him - if he has the ability to upset you and that's what he's trying to do, that's also not going to look good for you.

There are no guarantees about what a court will do. But the odds are that he will not be able to get custody unless he can prove you are a danger to the child and that won't be easy.

You need to stop harassing him, but you can justify the record of calls he has because you were upset that he left you.

However, you do have a problem. If you leave him off the birth certificate, then you will have difficulty if you file for child support against him. On the flip side, if you put him on the birth certificate that makes it easier for him to establish himself as the legal father with rights.

So you really should consult an attorney BEFORE you give birth. The attorney will tell you which option is best for you and how to protect the child from his getting full custody.

Ok, since you are not married, he will have to prove he is the father in court, using DNA evidence.

Next are you calling him every 10 min?? If so why, in fact why are you even talking to him at all at this point, don't, don't listen to him, he is trying to scare and control you, so you don't fight for your rights.

Next, OK if you really are crazy, a real mental health case, then he has to prove it, with evidence in court, he may prove you harrass him with phone calls and get a court order for you not to contact him, but that is not really crazy by legal terms.

You need to get custody of the child, file for support, he will most likely have to work sometimes in the next 20 years.

If he does sign the birth certificate don't listen to his threats about not paying child support because he will be obligated to do so especially once a judge order him to.

Quote:

Originally Posted by help4mommy2b

hi
i am 7 weeks pregnant. i was with the dad for 3 months. when he found out i was pregnant he spilt and left ny state to go to washingotn state.

he told me he does not want to be with me but wants the baby. he told me he is going to prove to the courts i have mental problems and take the baby to washington.

can he do this? i can see when the child reaches a certain age the child going there for a week or two a year, but as a infant or baby can a court want a child to travel cross county.

can he really go to the court and tell them i am crazy. he said that i call him so much he is going to show them the records and thats why i will loose the child. will nys really take a baby from its mom? at this point i am wondering if i should even have the baby if the fight has already started....

also he said he will never get a job so he wont have to pay support. can he do that? i always thought there was a minimun each month required even if one is unemployed.

if he is not here through the pregnancy does he really haave rights?

I am not crazy. I promise you that. That is his defense. But I do have another question. If this ever went to court where would the court be?
I live in ny. The baby was conceived and will be born in ny. He lived here in ny for 30 days and then went back to Washington. Is there anyway this could end up in Washington courts? Or does it go by where the baby is born?

Quote:

Originally Posted by help4mommy2b

i am not crazy. i promise you that. that is his defense. but i do have another question. if this ever went to court where would the court be?
i live in ny. the baby was concieved and will be born in ny. he lived here in ny for 30 days and then went back to washington. is there anyway this could end up in washington courts? or does it go by where the baby is born?

I didn't think you WERE crazy - you should see the stuff the "crazy" people post here. You just sound worried.

Court would be in NYS IF that is where you and the baby live. He would have to come back to NY to file papers and for a hearing.

It's YOUR - and your baby's - residence.

Anything else?

Nope that's it thank you