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-   -   What is the RIGHT thing to do? (https://www.askmehelpdesk.com/showthread.php?t=257730)

  • Sep 7, 2008, 11:16 AM
    Animal0126
    What is the RIGHT thing to do?
    My boyfriend and I have been together now for almost 15 months and he just recently went off to college so we are trying to adjust to not seeing each other every day like we used to. Well he has been gone now for about 3 weeks and we talk on the phone every day for at least 5 minutes, which is better than nothing to me. He has become very cocky lately and he says that I am always pissed off at something and now we are on a break until this Friday. I love him with all of my heart and he means so much to me, but what should I do? I am willing to make things work, but if he doesn't want to then so be it. What should I do about our situation? I am hoping that this break of not talking to each other will help us out and he will realize how much I love him and what we both mean to each other...

    Please help...
    Anne :(
  • Sep 7, 2008, 11:26 AM
    Wondergirl
    It doesn't work that way. He is in a whole 'nother environment with interesting people to meet and a huge variety of things to do for fun and to benefit his education. I don't know the statistics, but would guess that most high school romances end once at least one of the couple goes to college or into the military.

    You would be doing him a favor by giving him his freedom, or like what my high school boyfriend of two years and I had said to each other once he left for college, and then I did a year later: "You're free to date with no questions asked. Have fun in college, and, if our relationship is meant to last, it will."
  • Sep 7, 2008, 11:40 AM
    bigbird213
    I started my relationship in my Jr year of high school. It lasted until my Jr year in college. I can tell you that moving away to school, out of state, was one of the most stressful things I had to do as far as my relationship was concerned. We, like you guys, saw each other every day, and spent TOO much time together during high school and the summers. I gave up much of my life for her, didn't see my friends, etc.

    When I got to school, it seemed unrealistic to me that she wanted to talk for an hour or more on the phone everyday since "We spent all the time in the world together before that". It doesn't sound like you are doing that, but be careful. From my point of view, talking on the phone is only good if you have something to say and get it over with. I know many women like to talk and just have conversations on the phone. I'd have to bet that most guys, like me, don't enjoy phone conversations as much. Especially if they evolve into awkward silence...

    Its going to take some adjusting for sure, and communication is key, but don't talk just for the sake of talking...
  • Sep 8, 2008, 08:18 AM
    talaniman
    You both need a break, as your not adjusting as well as he is, and he may be changing his mind about this long distance relationship.
  • Sep 8, 2008, 08:35 AM
    jjwoodhull
    It's always hard to be the one "left behind". Your environment hasn't changed, so there is a big hole in the time that he used to fill. His environment is new so he is developing a new routine. He is meeting lots of new people and having new experiences. It is a very exciting time for him. Because of this it is very common for high school relationships to end when one or both go to college.
  • Sep 10, 2008, 01:32 PM
    Animal0126
    I know that and I support him completely! I just want us to stay together and try to work things out...

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