My husband of 34 years has Never grown up He is mean and disrespectful of me every time we have a financial crisis. This has always been the case off and on through out our marriage. He has told our children he wants a divorce.He has also made it known as in the past to his mother and his sister how he feels. But with me causing it.Though he won't follow through with it. He knows we're miserable and he likes being in control. He has the bedroom and I'm sharing with my kids. My daughter 22 and my youngest son 15 does not like the disrespect and actions of there father, In fact they beg me "let's leave." He doesn't spend any time with them and rarely speaks to them at all . This has really been the case for well over a year now. Our older son who works at the same co. and contributes to the income(he lives at home} is my husbands confidant and only friend . My husband talks about me horribly and calls me lowly names to our older son who does or saids little if anything in my defense. He saids it doesn't do any good to say anything. Our daughter is appalled at this and thinks little of her older brother for this so does our younger son who would never let anyone get away with being disrespectful to his mom or his sister! I want to sell our property in which we both own jointly. He and our older son pay the bills. The mortgage is in my name only. My credit is not good We have gotten behind on bills. My name is on everything his is on except he had the mortgage in my name only! We live in FL. ANd I want to know if I borrow money from family or friends could I use my part of the equity as collateral WITHOUT my husbands OK? Please help as what I can do to escape this nightmare. He's already made it clear that I have No rights, and He will NOT co-operate with any of my pleas of going our separate ways and being amicable about everything. We can't afford this house. And now he has a hobby of re-storing old trucks. That's only costed us more money and STRESS.. I worry everyday of losing our home. It's appraised at 525,000 and we have a mortgage of 300,000 No liens.He doesn't want to leave. He made the statement to MY brother who visited us over the holiday That there is NO HOPE for our MARRIAGE! But that he could live with the way things are from now on. I need to get some sort of training for a job. I have no money except for gro. And I can't stand very long at a time due to health problems. I want my independence from this Man who has Never Really cared for me. Can I file for divorce without him agreeing? Is there any legal way to attain money from this property. I've suggested to my older son to buy me out.
But he says his credit is not good and frankly his Dad won't agree to that. He wants me OUT with nothing. His remark is LIVE WITH THE WAY THINGS ARE OR LEAVE! WHAT CAN I LEGALLY DO IF ANYTHING AT ALL?

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Originally Posted by Old Blue

The mortgage is in my name only. My credit is not good We have gotten behind on bills. My name is on everything his is on except he had the mortgage in my name only! We live in FL. ANd I want to know if I borrow money from family or friends could I use my part of the equity as collateral WITHOUT my husbands ok? Please help as what I can do to escape this nightmare. He's already made it clear that I have No rights,,and He will NOT co-operate with any of my pleas of going our seperate ways and being amicable about everything. We can't afford this house. And now he has a hobby of re-storing old trucks. That's only costed us more money and STRESS.. I worry everyday of losing our home. It's appraised at 525,000 and we have a mortgage of 300,000 No liens.He doesn't want to leave. He made the statement to MY brother who visited us over the holiday That there is NO HOPE for our MARRIAGE! but that he could live with the way things are from now on. I need to get some sort of training for a job. I have no money except for gro. and I can't stand very long at a time due to health problems. I want my independence from this Man who has Never Really cared for me. Can I file for divorce without him agreeing? Is there any legal way to attain money from this property. I've suggested to my older son to buy me out.
But he says his credit is not good and frankly his Dad won't agree to that. He wants me OUT with nothing. His remark is LIVE WITH THE WAY THINGS ARE OR LEAVE! WHAT CAN I LEGALLY DO IF ANYTHING AT ALL?

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Of course you can get a divorce without his consent. You simply consult with a Family Law/Divorce Attorney, tell him you want a divorce, he prepares the papers and your husband is served with divorce papers. He may agree to terms, he may not. If he does, good. If not, there would need to be a trial or hearing of fact.

A Judge will review all your assets and debts - it doesn't matter whose name is on your mortgage, it's who owns the property and for how long that becomes important - and make awards in both directions. Spousal support, child support, division of assets, custody of children.

He can't make you leave and you can't make him leave the marital home.

You WILL get money out of the property, how much depending on how the assets are divided.

What you do legally is sue for a divorce or separation - with that will come an order not to dispose of any assets so neither one of you can sell anything during the term of the action.

Happens all the time.

If your looking for a job also have you ever thought about a job in a call center they will train you there and you don't need experince for most of them and this way you could be working and you would not have to stand all day you would be sitting at a desk answering phones

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Originally Posted by meagank

if your looking for a job also have you ever thought about a job in a call center they will train you there and you dont need experince for most of them and this way you could be working and you would not have to stand all day you would be sitting at a desk answering phones

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I realize you work for a call center but this is a legal board. Please try not to go off subject.

And please use punctuation.

This is also very bad legal advice - this woman does not work, has not worked. If she intends to ask for spousal support (and she certainly should and her Attorney will recommend that she do so) now is NOT a good time to find employment. She should go into Court in the same condition she has been in during her marriage. Again, bad legal advice.

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Originally Posted by meagank

No JudyKayTee i do not work for a call center .please do not go around following me in here .posting things about me you do not know for a fact .And things that are not true About me .Like this one .She was also saying in her post that she was looking for work .But did not know what kind of work she could do. As she can not stand for long periods of time because of health problems. So i was sugesting to her that she could possibly work for a call center. And this would be a job that she could do .And not have to stand but be able to sit at

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Here's what you posted: "i work at a call center for a job liek u are aplying for i ahd to go though a brack ground check when frist hird thorugh a temp agency to work there and then when i was hired on later by the main company they had to do a more intense background chek they are mainley looking if u have any criminal record or theft charges as you will be dealing with peoples personial information and most times there credit card information things like this so if u have anything theft for credit or fraud this can hurt you."

These are your own words and can be easily looked up. If you post the same honest information all the time you don't have to worry about your words coming back to haunt you.

You also posted you are precluded from giving the name of the company due to privacy issues; then you put the company name in your profile

Please don't confront me, stating I am incorrect, you do not work for a call center - when I am merely quoting YOUR post of approximately one month ago.

As far as "following you around" - this is a legal board. I'm an expert here. Post here and you have a really good chance I'll show up. If you don't want to come across me, post somewhere else.

And, again, you've given very bad legal advice.

You've had your say; I've had my say. OP's question has been answered. Maybe it's time to close this thread.