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-   -   Boyfriend trouble (https://www.askmehelpdesk.com/showthread.php?t=255110)

  • Aug 31, 2008, 04:15 PM
    Greengal18
    Boyfriend trouble
    I am deeply confused and in need of some good advice. My boyfriend and I have been dating for 3 months and we live about 30 minutes away from each other. I love him to death completely but lately we have been having some troubles and sometimes it makes it hard to love him. He's done some drugs when I've told him how I feel about drugs because my real dad is into them and he's a abuser and I don't want to be with anyone like my real dad. Well he promised me that there would be no more drugs and I trusted him because I give everyone 2nd chances and today he's told me that last night he had done it again and he doesn't understand why its made me upset. And he's beginning to test my trust, Well then we haven't talked in the past 4 days until today because we both have sports and school and work so we sometimes go a few days without talking, well he let me go after 10 minutes of talking because he had an important phone call on the other line. And it kind of made me wonder if it was a girl. And I feel guilty for thinking it because I love him and I should trust him. I don't know how to go about our relationship at this moment and I want to really work me and him out, but how do I do it? If anyone could please help itd be greatly appreciated. Thanks.
  • Aug 31, 2008, 04:29 PM
    N0help4u
    First realize you can't MAKE it work, either it is going to or it isn't.
    When you try and MAKE it work you are either going to be too pushy, too untrusting, too controlling or too in denial because you want it so bad.
    Only he knows if he has quit the drugs and maybe fell that one time or if he is trying to hide it from you, but I would think that since he told you that he did once then he is trying to be honest. If you are going to jump on him or treat him poorly when he confides in you about it then he WILL try and hide it from you.
    So you need to either break up with him or give him moral support and trust that he is trying to quit. BUT also watch for red flags so that you do not fall for someone that wants the drugs and you and is not being honest. Again you can not let worries run wild in your head and thinking he may be doing things he isn't. Look at things realistic and not jumping to emotional conclusions.

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