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-   -   What the hell is going on? (https://www.askmehelpdesk.com/showthread.php?t=254735)

  • Aug 30, 2008, 12:17 PM
    srulik86
    What the hell is going on?
    OK so I met a girl just over a month ago, we went out 3 times, she is a year older than me, and we seemed to really get on and like each other. I accept she is rubbish at replying to text messages, and fb messages, But we went out on Monday, spent all day 2gther, she kept asking to come and see my show saying 'WHEN we go out next time,' etc, implying that there will be a next time. But I haven't heard from her all week. Then I text her yesterday and she still hasn't responded. I don't know what to do? Do I message her on fb and ask wats going on? Or do I just forget about her and move on. I do like her, but id like to know where I stand. But I don't want to come across as intense because we've only met up 3 times. Any advcie please?
  • Aug 30, 2008, 01:53 PM
    Tralyn
    I guess I would leave it alone at this point. If she gets ahold of you I'd wait awhile to respond back, make her wait as well. If you jump... it will leave her the impression you were just waiting to hear from her and she is obviously wanting to be in contact control. Just keep on livin' and if she gets ahold of you she does.. if not, not worth your time since she doesn't even give you the courtesy of a response. That is rude.
  • Aug 30, 2008, 03:01 PM
    Elyanah
    What is the matter with people today? What about trying a little patience? People need time to process what is happening in their lives, and just because someone does not respond when YOU want them to, means you just need to back off and get on with stuff, realizing that you will probably hear from her eventually. Just be patient, give her time, maybe something happened, maybe she HATES text messaging as a substitute for REAL human contact. How about just believe that you guys get on really well, there's potential for a relationship there, and give her a call in a week. Hey, maybe she's like me -- I NEVER call men because I am not comfortable doing so. Don't worry so much. Just be patient.
  • Aug 30, 2008, 03:28 PM
    baby girl xx
    Quote:

    Originally Posted by srulik86
    ok so i met a girl just over a month ago, we went out 3 times, she is a year older than me, and we seemed to really get on and like each other. i accept she is rubbish at replying to text messages, and fb messages,. but we went out on monday, spent all day 2gther, she kept asking to come and see my show saying 'WHEN we go out next time,' etc, implying that there will be a next time. but i havent heard from her all week. then i text her yesterday and she still hasnt responded. i dont know wat to do? do i message her on fb and ask wats going on? or do i just forget about her and move on. i do like her, but id like to know where i stand. but i dont wana come accross as intense coz we've only met up 3 times. any advcie please?

    I think you should leave it couple of days and then txt her asking how she is and then if still no reply move on.play it cool don't come across as obsessed or pushy
  • Aug 30, 2008, 03:36 PM
    talaniman
    Let her contact you, and in the meantime, keep enjoying yourself.
  • Aug 30, 2008, 03:40 PM
    Tralyn
    Elyanah - I don't appreciate being told my advice was stupid. You can disagree all you want, doesn't make you right either. I have a right to help with my opinion just as you do.

    Srulik86.. I stand by my opinion and agree wholeheartedly with talaniman!
  • Aug 30, 2008, 04:01 PM
    Elyanah
    Sorry, didn't mean to offend. I just think it is NOT SMART or PRODUCTIVE to advise people to play games! What good can it do? If you read my post, maybe you'd agree that once you start the games, then it's games from there on out. It was not my motive to upset anyone. I'm just speaking the truth.
  • Aug 30, 2008, 04:17 PM
    Tralyn
    To be quite honest I don't think that waiting for a little while before you respond back to somebody is playing a game.. it's simply not jumping at someone's response. Elyanahs disagreeing with me did make me read my post again however and I should clarify what I mean by wait awhile. I would not respond the second she gets ahold of you. I would wait a couple of hours at least, maybe a day if you see fit. Sometimes when we are too readily available for people they catch on to that and they play on that.
  • Aug 31, 2008, 04:51 AM
    srulik86
    Wel I have a show coming up in 2 weeks and she said she really wants to come and see me perform. So I'm assuming she may get in touch. But I just thought it's a littlew rude seeing as she has done this many times before, just ignoring my messages. Which makes me wonder if she really is interested or not.
  • Aug 31, 2008, 06:26 PM
    Tralyn
    I think it is rude as well. I wouldn't be at this person's beckon call. I wish you luck srulik86!
  • Aug 31, 2008, 06:33 PM
    N0help4u
    I don't think Tralyn was giving playing games advice.
    If the girl doesn't get back like he is insignificant in her life why does he have to make her priority like he was just sitting by the phone waiting to answer it the second she called.
    She can call and leave a message and he can take his time to see how he wants to proceed.
    No game about it.

    He definitely should not make the next move right now.
  • Aug 31, 2008, 08:21 PM
    Teresa51
    srulik86---Not meaning to sound harsh, but people (this girl included) do what is important to them. My question to you would be, why would you want to be involved with a girl who seems to have no common courtesy/respect towards you? I personally believe that your angst over this situation could be accurately desribed as your sensing of "red flags" going up. I am willing to bet that she wants to go to your show for reasons other than you! Again, I am not meaning to sound harsh, but I think you already know what to do with this situation.
  • Sep 1, 2008, 11:26 AM
    srulik86
    Yep, I know what to do with this situation... forget her! Just very rude on her part. Like ignoring me would just give me the hint she isn't interested anymore.
  • Sep 1, 2008, 12:36 PM
    talaniman
    I think you have figured out her words are to be taken with a grain of salt, her agenda is unknown, her actions are obvious. She ain't that interested, so why should you be?

    Is it her fault you read her words, with higher expectations than her actions deserve??
  • Sep 1, 2008, 01:18 PM
    hjpan
    Give her some space and time.

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