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Well, During Our Relationship My Boyfriend And I Have Experimented With Many Things.
One Of Which If Him Going Down On Me Which Seems To Be The Only Way He Can Make Me Climax... Besides Fingering.
During Sex I Find Myself Dissapointed Because I Feel Like He's The Only One That Gets To Climax. One Of My Friends Is Experiencing The Same Problem. But 2 Of My Other Friends Say They Climax About 3 to 4 Times A Round. I've Heard Some Women Can't Get Orgasms During Sex... Please Tell Me I Can!
For one, stop thinking that he makes you climax, as this is something you do for yourself, using the same mindset as when you are doing other things that do get you there.
Ever wonder why some things work, and some things don't? Have you experimented with different positions, that maximize stimulation where you want it?
Think about what the differences are, and just tell your man how you want it done, and see if it works. If it doesn't, then half the fun is moving on to something else to try.
Like what type of positions. When we met we were both virgins I was his first and he was mine so he doesn't have much experience... I think we just do basic positions now so which ones are best to stimulate.
The key to your orgasms may be your clitoris. Many women can't climax from intercourse alone. I would suggest him trying oral sex and manual stimulation of your clitoris. Do you masturbate to orgasm? If you do, you should have a not so hard time guiding him. If you don't then it will be a learning experience for the both of you (I suggest doing some research). Just remember, sex isn't just intercourse, and you should both take your time and feel satisfied.Quote:
Originally Posted by Queen_864
He will never be able to MAKE you climax, no man can. It will be up to you to know yourself & guide him so you are sexually satisfied. It will be up to you to relax & enjoy yourself so that an orgasm is possible. He can help or hinder that process significantly, but he can't make you satisfied without your cooperation & full participation. Good sex is not a spectator sport. Intercourse alone won't do it for a lot of women.Quote:
For one, stop thinking that he makes you climax, as this is something you do for yourself, using the same mindset as when you are doing other things that do get you there.
As DrL says, many women need more direct clitorial stimulation in some form or another to climax so you will need to find a position that makes that easier for you to get during intercourse. If that doesn't work, enjoy the sensations while he gets his but make sure to get yours orally or manually before and/or after he's ejaculated so you both are satisfied.
WorldGroups - Love and Health
Quote:
This month's myth is that intercourse alone should stimulate orgasm in most women. And this, I'm afraid, is a myth that lots of both men & women believe, & it causes a lot of unhappiness, because in fact, the truth is that men very much want to make their women happy, & they want to make their women satisfied.
And they think it's their responsibility. And women very much want to have good sex lives, & they feel also that it's their responsibility to be satisfied by their partners – they want to make their partners feel good by being satisfied.
So although research has shown that men lie about sex more than women do, the one lie that women tend to tell most often is that they've been satisfied, & they lie about the fact that they've had an orgasm when they haven't. And so this is a myth that really has to be busted, because women feel they ought to be having orgasms from intercourse, & men feel that they ought to be somehow providing that orgasm from intercourse.
And the fact is that it's just not the way the equipment has been made.
This popular idea that a woman, a mature woman, a healthy woman should have orgasm by intercourse alone, was made popular (at least in the last century – that is, the 20th century) – this erroneous concept – by Freud.
Oh I Always Get Mine Before Or After! Lol! But Thanks.
We will be experimenting with this tomorrow...
I'll definently give an update! Haha
So it didn't work. We were in a bit of a rush because we had company on the way but still... nothing. I think I'm like psyching myself out perhaps...
You have to relax and lose the mental block. Can you with other guys? Maybe he dosen't have that motion for you.Quote:
Originally Posted by Queen_864
Until you lose the mental block it will be increasingly more difficult if not impossible for it to happen the way you want.
But if you are getting yours, what is the real problem for you then, that you are not the way he is? Men & women are built differently & he can't easily multi-orgasm the way women can & frequently do. How would it make you feel if he didn't want to have sex with you or found it disappointing because you can have more orgasms then he can in a session?
I think you are losing track of the point of playing sexually & it will have a detrimental effect for no good reason. Especially if you are getting yours, which indicates that he's willing & able to make it good for you in the ways he can.
The more you try to force things with sex the rarely that works for well for either. Instead of enjoying the things that do bring both of you pleasure, focusing on the one way it does fire is going to taint all the rest if you're not careful & make sex decidedly more of a chore than fun the way it should be or a bonding experience the way it can be.
Have you just jumped on top, and rode it for what its worth?? Just because something didn't work (you were rushed and expecting company), doesn't mean give up. If at first you don't succeed, try, try, again.
Did you get the book, The Joys Of Sex?? The main things are to communicate to your partner, your needs, wants, and anything you think is interesting to you.
Many MANY women can not orgasm from sexual intercourse. It's not how the female body is built. Some women can have orgasms from nipple stimulation, some from clitoral stimulation, and some from intercourse, and some from having their ears licked---or whatever. If you're able to HAVE an orgasm---be happy.
Woman on top has a better chance for orgasm from intercourse. There's also self stimulation WHILE having sex.
If you can orgasm at all, you're ahead of many women. I would enjoy what you have and stop worrying so much about what you don't have.
Work on your fantasizing ability during masturbation; make those good neural pathways solid and ready to perform. That may help you bring about the slambang of multiple orgasms you will love from copulation.
Good Luck, girl, :D
No one gets it cause they haven't dealt with it. I have the same and I mean same problem and it sucks cause you think something is wrong with you. I was told my problem might be because I had an ex that abused me in every possible way. Mental and all so I was told to go to a specialist cause 90 percent of sex problems come from mental problems. It might also be nerve problem. Do your legs twitch when he or you do it?
This thread is over two years old. Chances are the person won't ever see this advice. Staying within the last month or so is a good bet.
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