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-   -   How to get 20 yr old to try things our way her way didn't work (https://www.askmehelpdesk.com/showthread.php?t=252942)

  • Aug 25, 2008, 05:50 PM
    mom0f5
    How to get 20 yr old to try things our way her way didn't work
    She just graduated ,she has LD and wants to so bad live with her boyfriend who also has LD and neither one of them are able to take care of themselves .he lives by hisself but the disability pays the bills and what he can't his dad does. We want help them there at all. She use to work and have a little more respect for me (we use to be really close)doesnt want to be here at all. Where we can help her get a life and take care of herself so she can live in this world. We all know how cruel it is out their (especially for those that are slower than others).as of now there is no hot water a oven that is broke and besides no food to eat. Am I wrong for pulling a stunt to trick her into coming home where I really do need her to help me with home she's not an only child. Just the oldest. Did we try to hard to protect her and keep her safe or do we let her go.
  • Aug 25, 2008, 05:57 PM
    N0help4u
    You need to let her do it her way until she sees it is not working and let her know your door is always open if she ever does want to come home.
    Personally, I think I would probably try and help with some things for her where I could because she is making the effort and she needs to learn and make it work instead of always relying on you. What would she do someday if and when you were not there for her to rely on. I think she deserves some credit for trying. There are so many able bodied people in their 20's and 30's who live with and off mom and dad because they have no ambition.
  • Aug 25, 2008, 05:58 PM
    BlakeCory
    Letting go of a child is never easy, especially a child you have had to work so hard to protect all these years.
    You know your daughter better than anybody on this site. We don't know the extent of her disability. You said,
    Quote:

    Originally Posted by mom0f5
    neither one of them are able to take care of theirselves.

    If that is true than there isn't anything to discuss. Is it really impossible or only nearly? It's natural to want to protect your kids from problems. But is this a problem she can overcome?
  • Aug 25, 2008, 06:01 PM
    N0help4u
    I agree with Blake I have seen many people with learning disabilities manage on their own. They do have struggles but they do manage.

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