There are no real "defaults" in the Display Properties, as such. If you never went in there and saved your settings with a unique name to create a "restore point" specific to monitor settings, you're going to have to fiddle with it to get it looking the way you want.
When you DO get it good, be sure to SAVE those settings so you CAN restore them in future if they do get tweaked for any reason.
This page explains how to fix your "different window" problem:
FIX: Open each folder in the same window
If the first example doesn't fix it, then the .reg file located on that site can be merged into your system to get things behaving properly.
Cheers.